


A Walk In Shadows

by RageAgainstTheNormal



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Child Abuse, Childhood Memories, Christmas Fluff, Cuddling & Snuggling, Drug Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, First Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hospitalization, Hurt, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Rape, Romance, Sexual Abuse, There's Happiness I Swear, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-24
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-04-17 02:15:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 16
Words: 34,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4648401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RageAgainstTheNormal/pseuds/RageAgainstTheNormal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Forever?" Levi had asked his friend at a young age.<br/>"Forever." Eren had agreed. </p>
<p>Then came the dark days, the ones where Levi struggled, and Eren was blinded. Levi struggled with his own dark thoughts, and haunting memories of his childhood father. Eren, on the other hand, struggled with a girlfriend who didn't want him to be around his childhood friend. All hell breaks loose, along with a new love forming. The pair would have to struggle through their own emotions, Kenny Ackerman, and finally, death itself. </p>
<p>High-School AU. Rape/Violence/Trigger Warnings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Levi-The Perfect Tree. c:](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Levi-The+Perfect+Tree.+c%3A).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First few chapters being edited, as the draft for this was done long ago. My apologies for any mistakes, or how horrible my writing is at the beginning. Kay is a side character, completely, don't worry.~ 
> 
> With regards to that, please enjoy!

“Kay-Kay, do I have to go to school?” The raven haired boy asked, silver eyes wide and filled with fear at this point, his thin eyebrows raised into a morbid expression, black hair dangling messily over the boy’s forehead. Being six then, Levi arrived at this point of his first day of school. Kay-Kay, his sister threw back her head and laughed.

“Silly, Levi-Chan! Of course you have to go! How do you think mommy would react if you didn’t at least try?” The blonde teenager said, blue eyes twinkling like the very ocean where the beach house sat. Kay was eighteen now, and had taken full custody over her younger brother. Their mother, Scarlet, had passed while giving birth to Levi. For the first four years of the boy’s life, Levi was shoved into the hands of his biological father, Kenny.

Kenny was a peculiar man, no, cruel. Kenny was an abuser, and found great joy in tormenting young Levi in unspeakable ways and methods. When Kay had seen all the bruises on Levi, and when Levi constantly broke down in tears, Kay freaked out. Levi could remember the scene clearly…

_Covered in scars, bruises, bumps, and stained with blood, the four year old boy had cried and cried. Sitting in an alleyway wasn’t the best either. The pain in the boy’s body was screaming at him. When another sharp pain struck up his back, Levi threw back his head and released a scream. Blood gushed from the young raven haired boy’s wounds, pooling around him. The air smelled of thick blood, the hint of metal wafting over his nose. If Levi wasn’t as used to the blood as he currently was, he would have retched right then and there. It was disgusting, the very smell stinging Levi’s nose. His ashen eyes were dulling now, the blood more rapidly dripping into the puddle beside his numb body. Gritting his tiny teeth, Levi let his eyes slowly drift closed, whimpers escaping his crimson stained lips._

_“Jay, seriously, stop.” Kay said sternly, shoving her boyfriend away from her. “I’m being serious, I need to find Levi. I don’t trust him with his dad.” Kay explained, her blue eyes sparkling with concern._

_Jay had scowled at that point, reaching an arm out to reach for the blonde sixteen year old again, only to have his hand swatted away. “Kay, he’s fine. Please, I barely get any time with you.” Jay said, his brown eyes clouded with something, though it wasn’t love. More so obsession, and wanting possession of the girl._

_Kay pushed a strand of blonde hair away from her own face, her lips curling up into a stubborn and worried look. “I want to check. I’ll spend the rest of the night with you if he’s okay, please.” Kay practically begged, placing a hand soft on her boyfriend’s cheek. Kay was scared to be truthful. She didn’t want Jay to become mad at her once again, and explode on her. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time he had gotten his temper out of control and freaked out on her._

_“Fine,” Was the only thing that left the brown haired males lips, his eyes cold and distant at this point. “You owe me though.” Jay said after a moment of awkward silence, standing from Kay’s bed._

_At the time, Kay was obsessed with pink and flowery things, but not too girly. Being from a fancy prep school, Kay was sophisticated, but girly all at the same time. Her room was a pale white, with blue swirls carefully painted onto the walls. In the room was a simple sleek, brown dresser, covered in a soft pink lamp, a makeup case, and a stack of magazines. Hidden in one of the drawers though… was something Kay wanted no one to see. It was her dark secret, something she would be shamed about in her preppy school. Art supplies. That was what was in the drawer. Colored sharpies, sketchbooks, pencils, charcoal, paint, and everything an artist could dream of. Kay loved to draw, but everyone else said art was ‘stupid, boring, for geeks only.’ Kay thought they were all idiots, frankly. But, Kay simply flashed a smile, nodded in agreement and hid her real feelings. Kay didn’t want to lose her preppy group, high up friends, status, or the perfect jock boyfriend. Kay’s life was a dream come true to others, but Kay hated it all. Kay wanted to be messy, to draw and paint every day, and not worry about stupid Jay and his abuse. The girl wanted to break free, but that would never happen. Kay was stuck, chained to the thick walls of society, un-able to ever escape. In other words, Kay was a slave and prisoner to popularity, status, and her social life._

_Kay let a breath of a sigh escape her lips, standing up as well, smoothing down her plaid skirt from her school uniform. “His dad’s house is close, I won’t be long, okay?” Kay asked warily, softly biting the inside of her cheek. It was a nervous habit, and it happened to be frequent around Jay and her clique. Always worrying if she would say the right of wrong thing… What she wore… It was maddening, the pain of being a social status._

_Jay’s cold brown eyes met Kay’s again, staring almost into her soul, a stare that made Kay shiver and bite the inside of her cheek harder. “Fine, I’ll be at my house. Don’t be long, my parents aren’t home tonight.” Jay said, a smirk tinting his lips._

_Kay gulped. There was no way this was happening… Kay didn’t want that, she just wanted to be with her little brother, read stories to him, and get away from all this high school drama, and Jay. “Okay.” Kay said carefully, her tone filled with worry and a bit of fear. Kay had to admit, she was scared of Jay. But, Kay would never say that out loud. Pursing her crimson lips together once again, Kay looked away from her boyfriend, trying to ignore his stare. Before Jay could say anymore, Kay snatched up her pink shoes, sliding them on. That was her key; Kay ran. Kay ran down the hallway, bursting from the front door. Levi… That was the only thing on Kay’s mind, was keeping her little brother safe... And, away from that wretched man. Kay had a bad feeling about him, and she couldn’t deny it anymore. Kay had to find him! Gritting her teeth together, Kay took off down the street. The sound of her feet pounding against the pavement wasn’t enough to mask her rabbit like racing heart, or the horns of cars, the yells of perverts, and the screeching of tires. None of it mattered to Kay right now; only Levi mattered._

_At that point, a familiar scream filled the girl’s ears, her blue eyes widening in shock. “Levi?!” Kay screamed, her tone filled with panic and terror. Where the hell was he?! Was he okay?! Kay felt like she was going to have a panic attack right there, but she refused to give up until Levi was safe and in her arms, away from the wretched man. If only she had proof of Kenny being a terrible man…_

_Turning the corner to an alleyway, Kay’s breath hitched, and her feet skidded to a stop. Just outside Kenny’s dump of an apartment… lied Levi._

_Beaten, abused, naked, bloodied, and filthy, the raven haired boy was lying in his own blood, practically choking on it. Levi’s ashen eyes met Kay’s for just a moment, just enough to show her the fear in his eyes, and the pain. It seemed like Levi tried to speak at that moment, but only the mortifying sound of choking on a thick liquid was heard. Blood… Levi was choking on his own blood._

_Kay screamed._


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And so Levi's first day of school began, where he met the brat.

Chapter Two

“Mommy always wants me to try my best, no matter what…” The boy said, his tone a bit sheepish, but weaker now. The memories… The memories were killing him, and it was obvious. The way his ashen eyes showed with something of dark pain, and his facial features were scrunched up, as if he was disgusted. And to be frank, Levi was disgusted. All the boy could picture at that moment was the dark and cruel face of Kenny Ackerman looming over him, the horrid smell of dry and stale cigarettes wafting off the man like he was a pile of trash himself. Then, there was the mix of vodka and other drugs the so called father decided to do every day, instead of take care of his own son. Levi was too young to realize it yet, only being six, he thought it may be the way all parents treat their kids. It wasn’t until his psychiatrist, whom he just met a week ago, told Levi what really happened. Those words of the doctor haunted his head, seeming to fill every open space of his brain; ‘Kenny was a cruel and insane man, who raped you, Levi. That isn’t a right thing to do, and neither is abuse. Tell me if anything else…’ 

“Levi?” Kay asked again, her blue eyes sparked with concern at the dazed and sick looking boy. “Are you okay, dear?” Kay repeated for the third time, tone slow and hesitant, as if scared to upset the ravenette. 

Kay’s soft voice brought Levi out of his dazing, which he was thankful for. Though, the boy didn’t think he could muster up enough strength to talk, so he simply nodded, before leaning up to kiss his sisters cheek. “Have a good day, Kay-Kay.” Levi murmured in his quiet voice after a moment, adverting his ashen eyes to the pale floor once again, his thin but dark eyebrows ruffled together in deep concentration. Don’t let her know you’re doing badly again, Levi… He reminded himself, teeth softly sinking into his soft insides of his cheeks. Levi was nervous, and as much as he tried to hide the fact, it was very obvious. His feet couldn’t stay still, along with his hands. If people could hear his thoughts, they might just go insane with him. Will they like me? What if I don’t fit in? What if I’m the freak of the school? Levi gulped, his tiny fist curling around the black backpack Kay had gotten him. 

Kay had filled it with a notebook, crayons, pencils, and a sharpener with a free pack of bonus erasers. Kay was nervous as well. After filing custody for Levi, everyone had stared at her with a weird look. “She’s eighteen and has a kid?” They would ask, snickering at this point. “What a hooker,” They would say, even though they didn’t know the full story. The world is a cruel but merciless place, Kay supposed… Her throat felt to be closing up at this point, blue watery eyes meeting distant gray ones. “Be safe, Levi-Chan. Kay-Kay loves you, and remember, Mommy’s watching over us.” Kay said, motioning to the ceiling, watching as Levi’s tiny set of teeth bit his pink upper lip. 

“I love you too.” Levi said, pausing for a moment. Just as the boy upturned his face to his sister to speak once again, a honk of the horn made his heart flutter. A bus… Kay told him about those; they were what transported kids to school and back. Remember your bus number, she said. It’s very important, she had explained. Levi paid great attention to his sister then, and always have and will. Kay was the most important person in his life, and nothing could ever change that. Levi loved his sister. Since he never knew his mother, Kay was like Levi’s mother; and now she was officially his mother. It felt strange to the boy, but great at the same time. To think you have a sister who is your mother… The concept was strange to the boy, but at the same time, it was amazing. 

Kay spoiled him out of belief, when she had money, that is. The two were stuck for money, but whenever they had extra, Kay would take Levi to ‘Slurpee’s,’ an ice cream place that Levi adored.   
Brushing his thoughts away once again, Levi flashed a nervous smile at his older sister, before bolting through the font door. 

The bus was filthy looking, and it made Levi cringe. The filth reminded Levi of Kenny’s filth… The thought made a shudder shoot up the boy’s spine, as his feet numbly approached the large yellow vehicle. ‘Madris Community Schools’ was crappily painted on the side of the bus, along with a logo of some soft of plant next to it. Levi frowned. Their school mascot was a plant? How lame… Kay had told him about the tigers, lions, bears, fire ants… All these cool creatures, and the raven haired boy was stuck with a supposed ‘Madris Plant?’ Finally able to ignore his own thoughts, Levi hesitantly approached the opening doors of the vehicle, feet making soft scuffs among the cement. 

The bus driver had stared down at the boy then, her red hair curled up in a messy bun, her lips formed in a large scowl. Her body… Well, to be frank, Levi had never seen someone so huge, so he had to stifle a look of horror and curiosity. The horror was from the fact the driver looked like she could crush one of the kids like a bug. And the curiosity.. Levi was simply curious of how the lady got that big! Didn’t she have a parent like Kay, who said exercise was important? Levi cocked his head at the lady.   
“What is it, you little...” The bus driver continued on, even daring to call Levi one of the words Kay said he should never say, and if he did, he would have too wash out his mouth with soap. Levi’s eyes were as wide as saucers now, still sparkling with fear. The first day of school… Levi had half a mind to run back inside the house, and cling to Kay. No, he couldn’t do that. Levi had to be strong. Forcing himself up the bus stairs as quickly as possible, Levi’s eyes widened once more. 

The seats were filled with kids of all ages… In the front seats, the seats were filled with kids looking about his age. Most girls had their hair pulled into a tiny pony tail, or loose, and almost covering their complete face. A girl with black hair caught his eyes, her hair almost covering half of her face, and a purple scarf tightly wrapped around herself, pale and slender hands twisted into a ball of her pink dress. Perhaps he wasn’t the only one nervous… In the far back of the bus, kids with black stuff under their eyes sneered at him, and Levi gulped. Kay looked like she was the same age as most of those kids… Yet, Kay wasn’t as scary looking as the rest of them. A loud yell directed his attention back to the front of the bus, his ashen eyes landing on a boy with messy brown hair, wide and wild teal eyes, and in clothes that were like Levi’s; poor looking. Dressed in a green shirt, with strings to hold the top together, the boy’s teal eyes were glimmering with anger, and it seemed to be directed to a boy with auburn hair, and a weird looking haircut. The boy with the weird haircut was dressed almost in the same style as his doctor; fancy and loaded, as Kay said. The boy had a look like he ruled the world, and it almost made another scowl appear on Levi’s lips.   
“Jean! Stop throwing stuff at me!” The brunette boy shouted, his teal eyes glimmering with tears now, obviously aggregated. 

Levi’s eyes flickered to the other boy again, who only giggled. “How about you stop me?!” The boy shouted in glee, until a hand as fast as lightning came thumping down on the boy’s auburn head. Levi’s eyes widened once again, his eyes peering through his own raven hair to see the girl with black hair and scarf, looming over the mean boy, her face dark looking now. “Don’t even look at my brother, or ill kill you.” The girl said, her tone hushed but filled with venom. Levi was stricken with shock at that point. The girl would kill the boy named Jean?! Gulping as the bus driver closed the door with a loud thud, the bus shot back into action, making Levi’s frail body stumble. Desperate to get a seat, Levi hesitantly sat down next to the brunette boy, steel orbs adverted to the filthy looking floor. Gum wrappers, gum itself, and a few other things Levi didn’t recognize were scattered across the floor, along with something he had seen in the stores; Cheerio’s. Levi was curious at this point, to how the food got there, but he didn’t say anything. Were these kids filthy like Kenny, too? Levi hoped not. 

“Are you going to throw stuff at me too?” A hushed voice came suddenly, identifying itself as the teal eyed boy whom Levi was sitting next too. 

Glancing up at the boy, Levi frowned. “No.” Levi said simply, his tone quiet, almost a whisper over the loudness of the bus, and the rumbling of the tires against the road. 

The boys face had lit up almost immediately after that, his teal eyes shimmering with happiness. “Thank you!” The boy said, his tone almost giddy now, and more able to hear clearly and loudly. “My name is Eren, I’m five!” Eren said, almost saying like he had recited it from a book, from the way it sounded like he had been practicing.

Levi glanced up through a strand of his own hair to stare at the boy named Eren, allowing his small and thin lips to curl into a light and nervous smile, before it disappeared once again. “Levi. I’m six.” Levi murmured, confused at the Eren’s awed shimmer in his eyes.

“Mikasa is that age too! She’s my sister!” Eren had said with a wide and toothy grin, though his front tooth was missing, making Levi stare. Levi had lost his first tooth the year before as well, and Levi could remember it feeling strange. It looked like Eren’s was already growing back though, whilst Levi’s back tooth was gone forever, as the doctor Kay took him too explained. “From the injury to the mouth, the tooth will never be able to grow back…” The doctor had said, “… Headaches will be more frequent from the injury…” 

When Eren pointed at the girl that had knocked Jean on the head, Levi’s eyes widened once again. Mi-Casa... The name felt weird to hear, and Levi was curious of how it would sound. “Mi-Casa...” Levi repeatedly slowly, his tongue feeling jumbled at such a name. 

When a pair of gray eyes, just like his, met his own, Levi gulped. Eren’s sister was intimidating, but not as scary as Kenny and his friends… The thought made Levi gain back all his confidence. After all, this girl couldn’t beat him to death, nor do the other thing the doctor said had happened. 

“It’s Mikasa.” Mikasa corrected Levi, before turning back to face forward, almost disappearing into a bundle of purple scarf and black hair. 

Levi nodded his head once, before turning back to sit normally in his seat. Gazing out the window, Levi somewhat longed to trade places with Eren, just so he could watch the scenery go by. Kay had taken him to the school once before, just to show him the classroom he would be in, and meet the teacher, but that was it. Frankly, Levi hadn’t been paying attention to the crooning on the trees and wisps of grass on their first drive there. Now… now Levi could see everything clearly, and it was amazing. The scenery was nothing of what had been at his home, or Kenny’s—certainly not Kenny’s home.

“What class did you get, Levi? Where do you live? I live on Maple Street, in Wyoming.” Eren said suddenly, his tone bright and cheerful as he turned to look at the ravenette, meeting his ashen eyes with his own wide and shimmering teal ones. 

Levi frowned. “I know that we live in Wyoming, Baka…” Levi murmured softly, before frowning once more. What class was he in? Levi could hardly remember. From his mind constantly pushing memories back into his young brain, Levi had almost forgotten. “I live on Dreet’s Street.” Levi said, lips pursed together in a fine line, trying to remember what his teachers name was. Was it Mr. Car..? No, that wasn’t it… Was it Mr. Cavwell? No, that didn’t sound anything like it. Levi frowned more in irritation. 

“I have Mr. Carkins.” Eren said, a smile on his lips, even though he was just called a fool. Eren wasn’t angered easily, unless it came to his friends, or a sensitive topic. 

Levi’s memory struck at the name, and Levi nodded his tiny head hurriedly. “So do I!” Levi said, ashen eyes glimmering with a light strike of happiness. Levi was thankful he would at least know one person in his class.   
The two boys exchanged a smile at that point, both excited but nervous for their first day. Little did they both know, things would be a roller coaster from this point on.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi was broken.  
> Eren was gone.  
> Lost in the madness in his head Levi succumbs to his worst fears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not know Attack On Titan or any of the characters, obviously.   
> Though my Oc's are mine. 
> 
> Warning: May be triggers here, self harm mention from this point for a while. You've been warned about the sad shit.

Chapter Three

The heat of August seemed to bring curses upon the Ackerman brother and sister that year, and everything seemed to be going wrong. Levi thought being seventeen, almost eighteen would be a breeze; being a teenager now, Levi was filled with pride for the first week. But, as the weeks went on, things turned to a living hell. 

Kenny was filling Levi’s head, making him clutch his head tighter between his hands, body rocking back and forth, but all of it was involuntary. Levi just couldn’t quit shaking… He needed more. No one was there to help... He was falling. Deeper, and deeper into that damned pit. 

By more, Levi meant his anxiety and depression pills his doctor had put him on. Kay was at a meeting at the school one night, and was talking to jean’s mother reluctantly about Levi’s childhood. Thee mother had giggled under her breath, immediately telling her bratty son. Jean had something to torment Levi about then, and tear him to shreds with his words. “Don’t you see? You’re a piece of filth too, just like your father.” Jean had said, a cruel smirk across his vile face at that moment, that particular day where Jean followed Levi home, taunting him the whole way. Taking another step after the stricken raven, Jean had began again. “You deserved to be raped, Levi. Everything’s your fault anyways, you piece of shit…” Jean had gone on with a grin of pride, once again using all the words Kay had washed Levi’s mouth out for. 

“Filth.” Levi repeated, just like Jean had called him in the memory, his pale and slender hands trembling along with the rest of his body now. ‘Go on, Levi. No one cares anyways, you heard it yourself, you failure. Everyone would be better off without you, so do it, you coward.’ A voice in Levi’s dark mind had sneered. “Coward…” Levi repeated once again, ashen eyes wildly stuck on the white wall in front of him. His mind felt like it had been twisted and deformed, and the only thing that could cure it… would be his medicine. Reaching up from the bathroom floor, Levi reached out a shaky hand to the medicine cabinet, eyes even more wild at this point. Not able to reach his pills, Levi stood, hands on the counter supporting him, making sure he didn’t fall right back over. As his eyes caught the mirror, Levi let a dry sob escape his lips. What am I becoming..? Was the only question that twisted, swirled, and slid through Levi’s mind at that point. 

Levi’s skin felt clammy, and looked even worse in the mirror, a sickening white color, along with black circles under his eyes. The black circles… Levi could thank his new found night terrors and insomnia for that. All he could dream about at night now was Kenny, positioned over him, a puff of smoke leaving his lips, before letting his head tilt back to laugh, a bitter laugh; a laugh that made Levi’s heart stop, and his entire body chill to the very core. The feeling was maddening, and drove Levi to the brink of insanity once again. Things were the worst they had been in years, and it seemed to be getting worse and worse. Eren… Eren knew about Levi’s past, and was his best friend, always there for him. But, lately… Eren had been hanging around his new girlfriend, and simply blown Levi off five times in the past month. Levi had given up hope a this point, sinking into a deeper dark hole of depression, falling, tumbling, slipping down the endless black hole, that seemed to dang endless, Levi though, no, knew that he would never be able to escape this. Levi would never be able to escape his torture, this hell on earth, this dark hole… Levi was disappearing into the shadows. Levi hadn’t told Kay about everything getting worse, and how he might need to go back to the psychiatrist, or how his grades were slipping like water through a grate. 

Levi always thought Kay had too much to worry about now; with a new, high paying job as an artist, and her… boyfriend. Kay’s boyfriend was all her time. Eren had a girlfriend, Kay had a boyfriend… Levi… Levi was alone. And that, that very thought was the one that haunted him almost every second of the day. It struck Levi as he sat alone at lunch, hood up, headphones in, trying to block out the name calling, and the fact Eren didn’t do anything about it, except frown and ignore it, chatting with his girlfriend, and his new jock friends. It came into his head when for the millionth time he was the outcast; last picked for sports, last picked for a partner in class, always walking alone… It hit Levi finally, that he was alone, and no one cared anymore. Perhaps Jean was right… Levi was a piece of filth that deserved to join the rest of the filth in Hell. 

No! Shut up, Levi! Levi screamed at his mind, ashen eyes floating back to his own reflection. Black long and jagged pieces of hair covered half of his face, along with his cloudy, cold, distant ashen eyes, and even a piece of hair touched his thin pink lips, and evident cheekbones. His collarbone was exposed at this point, clearly able to see at the line of his black shirt, along with the rest of his skinny body. Levi wasn’t weak, no, he was just super careful about his weight. Jace… Poor Jace at his school, a boy who weighed one hundred and eight pounds, was made fun of every day. Levi didn’t want even more people to make fun of him, hence the fact his weight stayed at exactly one hundred and ten pounds, nothing more. Anymore than that, and Levi would go mad again, going on a certain work out frenzy, hardly touching food for a week. But even then, Kay never seemed to notice. No one did anymore. Levi was invisible now, and that’s all that mattered. 

Glancing away from his reflection, Levi’s eyes hit his pills, a shaky hand going up to grab the two bottles, eyes hazy as they scanned over the labels. ‘Twice a day...’ They said. No, that wouldn’t be enough for today. Levi had already taken two, and he still felt shaky, filled with anxiety, and depressed on top of all that. It wasn’t good enough… Levi needed more. Twisting his fingers around the first bottle, Levi dumped a handful into his palm.


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren realizes the weight of his actions, finally annoyed with Annie and her antics. Fighting ensues.  
> After receiving a phone call from Kay, Eren's worries strike higher. Levi lied to Kay. 
> 
> Eren runs, faster then ever. Even if his lungs burst, Eren has to reach Levi. No matter what happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Attack On Titan or the characters, only my OC's. 
> 
> Hopefully this isn't an awful birthday present, Levi. xc  
> MY WRITING ISN'T ALWAYS DEPRESSING, I SWEAR.

A breath of a sigh escaped Eren’s lips, his teal eyes skimming over his surroundings. This was getting old… All Annie wanted to do was make out, or do this stupid stuff; flirt with other girls directly in front of Eren. It disgusted Eren, to be frank, and Eren couldn’t help the shimmer of annoyance in his eyes. ‘You can’t hang out with that creepy Levi anymore,’ Annie had said one day, directly after Eren had asked her out. Eren thought he was in sickly sweet love at that point, and reluctantly agreed. Now, Eren realized that was one of the biggest mistakes he had made. Every day Eren saw Levi at school, he looked to be getting worse. Levi had shared about his father raping, beating, and tossing him into the trash to die, and Eren felt like crap. Whenever Levi used to sink into a depression, Eren was right there for him. Now… Eren let his girlfriend’s friends make fun of him, and let Levi get torn to shreds. The guilt was starting to eat him alive, making his insides churn and twist in a very uncomfortable way, and his mind twist with guilt. Eren was honestly worrying out of control about Levi at the moment, twisting his fingers around, his teal eyes staring at nothing in particular. When he was able to make his eyes focus again, they landed on Annie, her blonde hair being twisted in between her fingers, a giggle escaping his bright pink lips. 

“Christa! Stop it! I’ll die of laughter!” Annie remarked, another giggle leaving her lips from the other blonde in front of her, who was also giggling now, Christa’s brown eyes twinkling with happiness. 

“Too bad!” Christa teased, even more giggles erupting from the two girls, before Annie gasped and pointed at a pale pink dress, a soft snicker leaving Annie’s lips, before they upturned into an almost cruel smile.

“Eren! Look! It looks like your sisters rags!” Annie said with a laugh, her ‘friend’ giggling along with her. 

That was enough to make Eren snap right there, his teal eyes hardening into a look of fury. If there was something in his hands, it would have been broken by now. First… Annie made him leave Levi, his best friend, and now she had the guts to make fun of his sister?! A growl escaped Eren’s lips. “Don’t you dare make fun of my sister! You bitch…” Eren went on a spew then, watching with even more fury as Annie continued laughing, but stilled at his curse words and horrible names, that she truthfully deserved.  
“What the hell do you mean by that, Eren?! You’re my boyfriend! Quit being a jerk! Ugh! You’re such a baby, Eren.” Annie snapped, crystal blue eyes sharply narrowed at Eren. 

Eren froze, meeting her eyes once again, this time, his eyes were even more filled with rage, teal orbs more black than anything, jaw tightly clenched, along with his fists at his sides. “I’m done with you and your shit,” Eren spewed angrily. “I’m not a baby. If anything, you are, Annie.” The brunette snarled, nails now digging into his palms from the anger flowing though his whole body. Annie… would pay for all this… She had crossed Eren’s line at that point, heck, even ran past his line. “You’re a pathetic insecure girl, who’s obsessed with power.” Eren snapped, his tone becoming even bitterer than before. His emotions were overflowing now. Every emotion; anger, sadness, aggregation, annoyance… All of the bad emotions he had felt in the time he was with the wretched girl were spilling out now, and Eren couldn’t hold it back anymore. It was maddening to trap all his feelings in… Eren froze in the middle of his thoughts, mind gears whirring with realization. Is this how Levi feels..? Because he hasn’t been able to spill his feelings… “He’s going to burst…” Eren whispered aloud, his before rage filled eyes becoming stricken with something near fear, and both worry. However, the anger for Annie only got worse after that moment, his nails now drawing blood in his own fists, clenching tighter at his sides. Eren didn’t care, however. He deserved the pain right now. Eren should have pushed Annie away once she told him to leave his best friend, who friggin’ needed him at that moment. The guilt was enough to make Eren stand completely still, not even caring about the crowd that was gathering from his yelling, and Annie’s cold glares. Eren wanted to sink to his knees at that moment, but his body was ridged, and felt as if his body had gone down by at least twenty degrees. Levi… Is Levi okay? He would have to call Kay… She would know for sure. 

However, Eren’s worries were interrupted by a fist connecting to his stomach, instant gagging at the feeling, knees crumbling beneath him, lungs crying out for air. Yet, none came at the moment, Eren’s teal eyes wide from surprise and anger. His hazy eyes lifted to meet Annie’s cold ones, scanning over her; Annie being in a fighting position, fists raised almost protectively, like his words actually hurt her tough shell. 

“Is this about that pathetic emo kid I didn’t let you be friends with?” Annie said suddenly, her tone monotone, and actually gave Eren a shiver down his spine, but the actual words made his rage build up again. 

Releasing his arms from around his stomach, Eren let another growl escape his lips. “Shut up! Shut up!” Eren yelled, brown hair messily strewn over his eyes now, his breaths ragged. Calm down, Eren… You can’t have burst of anger here… You can’t hit a girl… One side of Eren was saying that, while the other was saying the complete opposite. Come on, Eren… Are you going to let her make fun of Levi and Mikasa? Beat her up, let out the anger… She deserves it. Eren was torn; both sides had good sides, but he couldn’t decide… Eren’s mind was too fuzzy with anger for him to do anything fully, so he simply growled again, slowly standing. 

His legs felt like jelly, but he didn’t care. 

His mind was out of control, but he didn’t care. 

His hands were bleeding, but he didn’t care. 

Teal eyes now burned a dark shade, and before he could think better, Eren lunged forward. In a tangle of motion, Eren’s arms were clamped tightly on his ex’s shoulders, slamming her into the nearest wall with a loud thud, eyes practically burning holes into her. “If you insult my friends again, I’ll blind you.” Was all Eren said, his tone low and dangerous.

Annie was frozen in place at this point. No… Eren didn’t do that, did he?! Annie was stuck, and all she could do was gasp for air, nodding as quickly as possible. Oh… This may work out. The more sadistic part of Annie, hidden in her brain smiled. She could play the part of the defenseless girl… But, Eren would pay for this. For dumping her, calling her those disgusting names, and for being a worthless swine. Annie would hit him where it hurt most, she decided. Annie… Would go after Levi. This would be her revenge. 

 

Eren’s teal eyes slowly turned into a less dark stage, his hands slowly uncurling from around her now bruised shoulders. Eren wanted to laugh at what his eyes hit next; his blood stained her shirt. Leaving the two girls in silence, and frankly, the rest of the store in silence, Eren walked past the aisles and aisles of girl’s clothing, until his hands found what they were longing for the most right now; the exit. Ignoring the stricken look of customers and workers, simply mumbling a, “Excuse me….” Eren pushed through the exit, instantly grateful of the wind hitting his face. From being so angry, Eren had grew warm and uncomfortable. With the perfect spring air now dancing through his hair and brushing over his body, Eren relaxed his shoulders, giving in to the relaxing breeze. “Levi… Please be okay.” Eren whispered under his breath, tilting his head up to advert his ashen eyes to the sky above him. The cherry blossom tree was swaying so perfectly in the wind, and the clouds were lushly packed behind the limbs, making everything seem calm at that moment. Levi... He hadn't been at school... That feeling that was knawing on his stomach... It was hell. Was Levi okay? He didn't know.

But, Eren wasn’t a fool. 

Things weren’t calm, things weren’t okay. 

Things were a living hell, hidden underneath the surface of the beautiful distractions, and Eren wouldn’t, no, couldn’t fall victim to the tricks of the surface. Eren knew better. Although the surface may loom pretty, the inside was what mattered, and most of the time… It fooled people, but it wouldn’t hit Eren this time. 

Taking a deep breath, Eren briskly took off running down the sidewalk of the mall, wild and wide teal eyes scanning the area, his long legs carrying him to the other side of the street in a matter of no time. Eren just needed a little bit more distance between him and Annie… Eren didn’t want to stay around the wretched girl any longer than he had too; it was purely torture to Eren. The brunette was more worried about Levi now, and his well-being. At the same time, Eren was nervous, and the guilt was practically the weight of the world upon his shoulders. Would Levi even forgive his crappy apology..? If Eren was Levi, he wouldn’t. Eren was too much of a jerk to Levi, and the thought of what Levi was going through… It just about brought tears into Eren’s teal eyes, threatening to spill over the edge of his long and thick black lashes. Levi was going through so much… and Eren wasn’t even there for him. Eren was officially the worlds worst friend, and he knew it; there was no more excuses, no more denial—simply the truth. 

 

Eren finally stopped walking at the edge of the ‘good’ part of town. Eren lived in the good part, where mansions were everywhere, fancy houses, freshly mowed lawns, parks everywhere, and beautiful scenery. However, Levi lived in the bad part of town. This part was filled with litter, trash, brown spots with no grass, air smelling like blood and pollution… It even got to the point where victims of rape and abuse were left to die on the streets, and the bodies just stayed there, silently left to rot; and the police didn’t care. The town was over run with drugs, killings, abuse, rape, and filth. Yet, no one did anything about it. It disgusted Eren, frankly. At times it even brought a flash of anger from him to the police, where he wanted to cry out so badly, ‘Why haven’t you done anything about this?! People are dying!’ He wanted to scream it until they understood, or even just listened, but neither of those would happen, and sadly, Eren knew it. 

Stepping under a lush tree of green, Eren exhaled. Once again, his nerves were going crazy from the possibility of Levi not being okay. He had to act fast, thus, he pulled out his phone. Please, Levi… Be with Kay… Entering in the number, Eren bit his pale upper lip softly, his hands trembling now. Tch… Stop it, Eren… Don’t get too worked up… No matter what he tried to say to calm himself down, it wouldn’t work. Eren was too worried and stressed from the whole day—well, whole four years. That’s how long Eren had been separated almost completely from Levi. The last three years… That’s where Eren was completely separated from his best friend. Eren still heard about him, though. Though he didn’t know if the whisperings at school were true, it was enough to convince him Levi was still alive, but not living. Levi was there in classes and lunch, but he seemed so distant… It made Eren cringe. It was like Levi was slowly fading away with the very shadows themselves, and no one could stop him. No, Eren couldn’t have stopped him, but he didn’t have the guts to stand up to Annie… Eren was pathetic, or so he felt that way. 

Finally, he heard a voice at the other end of the phone. “Eren? What’s up?” Came Kay’s voice, though it was muffled, like she was driving in a windy area.  
“Is Levi with you?” Eren asked hurriedly, his tone now frantic and weak; even his voice was now trembling along with the rest of his body. He couldn’t even keep his hands steady anymore, and it was driving him crazy, so crazy he had to put the phone on speaker phone, and hold it with two hands, close to his mouth. 

There was a moment of silence from the other line, before Kay’s worried voice came through the phone, sounding almost identical to Eren’s stage of worry. “…I thought he was with you?! I left for a business trip this weekend, and Levi said he was staying with you!” Kay said, stuttering at just about every word.

Eren froze in place, his body chilling once again. “Kay… I haven’t talked to him four years…” Eren said slowly, his heart now pounding in his chest. Levi… be okay, wherever you are… be okay, please.  
There was another long pause of silence, before Kay spoke again, even more worried sounding. “What the frig do you mean?! I thought you two were best friends!” Kay spat, almost sounding angry at this point—sounding herself like she was having a panic attack. Kay was silent once again, before her weak voice came once again. “Levi… Check on him. He hasn’t been talking openly for a while now—I…I should have known… This is all my fault…” Kay murmured, a soft sob following her words.  
Eren gulped, even more worried at this point. Levi wasn’t even talking to Kay..? This wasn’t good at all… Levi always used to talk to the two about everything… Eren could feel the tears welling fully in his eyes at Kay’s next words. Her fault..? No… This was his fault, and Eren knew it. Eren left Levi when he needed it most… This, this whole thing is Eren’s fault. Eren closed his eyes then, warm tears sliding down his pale cheeks, spilling onto his red sweatshirt, and then onto his black shirt. “I’ll find him… It’s not your fault.” Eren said, choked up enough for his words to sound even weaker sounding now. “It’s mine.” Eren replied, sinking his teeth into his inner cheek. Ugh… He could already feel a welt coming on his cheek; but once again, Eren deserved the pain. “I ditched him when he needed it most. I’ll find him, don’t worry. I’ll call you once everything is okay.” Eren said, hurriedly hanging up the phone before Kay could reply. Eren didn’t even want to hear her voice at that point—it would just make him feel even more guilt than he already was feeling at this point. Sliding the phone back into his pocket, Eren let out a set of ragged breaths, running a hand through his messy hair. Come on, Eren… Get yourself together… Where could Levi be? Home, Eren had to check his home first. Praying silently to whatever God may listen, Eren took off sprinting faster than he ever has before.


	5. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short, depressing, (Oops.) chapter. 
> 
> WARNING: Self harm, drug abuse, etc are still in the following chapters. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own AoT, or any of their characters. Only my OC's. 
> 
> Levi struggles with the after affects of his mistakes and the self harm, short, sad, Levi-Centric.

The world felt like it was on fire, and Levi was stuck under the wood of the world, no, metal. It was a rush of relief at first, all the ills soothing his nerves… However, Levi realized his mistake once all the pills started kicking in—but too much. Levi felt tired, like he could curl up into a ball in the bathtub, and just lie there forever. That’s what the raven haired male planned to do in the begging, be able to relax… calm down… help his anxiety… But, there was the other side of his brain that wanted himself dead. No one would care, he told himself. No one would even know, he said. It would be easy, Levi told himself.

The pain came an hour after Levi was finally relaxed, curled up in the corner, the tears finally drying on his cheeks. His stomach began to twist and churn then, making Levi feel nausea to the max. It was a wretched feeling, and Levi just wanted it to go away, immediately, and let him die without all this pain. However, that wasn’t going to happen. Levi would die in agony, he was sure of it. At least then Eren could be happy with his new girlfriend… That ragged another sob from Levi’s throat, making the tears start again. Levi cursed the world at that point. “Why?! The medicine was supposed to help stop this!! These stupid emotions!” Levi screamed, cradling his aching head back into his knees once again. Numb… Levi just wanted to be numb again, to be strong enough to rid of these stupid emotions… No, Levi wanted to rid of himself at this point. He should bleed out soon enough already… The deep gashed laden down Levi’s arms were going to make an impact, at least some of an impact, right? Hurry up, Grim Reaper… Levi couldn’t hold back the nausea anymore. Levi retched until he felt like his throat was on fire again, and tears were streaming down his cheeks, dripping onto his bleeding arms.

Please… End this… Levi knew he couldn’t do this much longer; the pain of life was getting to the unbearable level. His chest hurt, his arms hurt, his head hurt, his stomach hurt… But, most of all, his heart hurt. 

Levi didn’t want to admit it before, but he ached for love. Jean was right—once again. Levi was a pathetic piece of trash, desperate for love. Maybe he was even an attention hog, like Jean said. 

No, that’s not true… Levi was a shadow at school. He wanted to be left alone then, but at the same time, he didn’t ever want to be alone again. Levi’s head was spinning with confusion again, making him slump away from the toilet, back into the desolate corner of the bathroom, wan eyes tilted up to the pale white ceiling, his vision blurry at this point. Tch… Come on already… Let me die… Levi’s head swarm, the feeling of warm blood streaming down his arms even more evident now, feeling like a waterfall was pouring over his arms on a warm summer day. It felt nice… This… This was proof… that Levi wasn’t inviable, nor was he a shadow. Shadows didn’t cry and bleed; but he did. The inviable ones didn’t have thing stain their skin; he did. The shadows couldn’t feel pain; he did.

The tears were more prominent on the raven’s cheeks now, breaths becoming slower… and slower… and slower… 

Levi cried for love, first and foremost. He cried for the want to not be alone anymore, to have someone to hold them in their arms again, to have someone tell him everything going to be okay, and to be there for him through all the tough things… Levi wanted love. 

Levi wanted his Kay back. With her new job and boyfriend… Levi was left alone once more with his thoughts, dark memories, and his own madness; leaving him alone to fight the demons that kept coming back, no matter how hard he tried… No matter what he did, nothing would make the monsters go away. No matter what Levi did to himself, the monster inside himself wouldn’t leave. 

Levi cried for the loss of his best friend, and how much he wanted to be back in Eren’s arms again, being comforted and supported through all the worst times. Levi longed to see that smile of his, his shimmering and happiness filled teal eyes, shining down on Levi. 

 

Through his tears, a loud bang interrupted his thoughts. What was that..? Levi’s breathing became level once again, and at that moment, he didn’t care if the friggin’ police were at the door… Things were peaceful right now. It got so peaceful that Levi was even able to close his eyes. His eyes felt heavy, anyways… This is good… Perhaps Levi can sleep now… 

“Levi, what would mommy think about this?” 

Levi’s calm attitude was shattered at the sudden memory of Kay talking. Mom… Mom is always watching over us, Kay had said. A new feeling washed over him, but it wasn’t anything peaceful this time. This was the feeling of guilt for his actions. 

“Stay strong, Levi… Mom loves you…” 

Levi didn’t know if his mother was actually there, or if he was just imagining it at this point. His mind was too fuzzy for him to feel anything right now… Just the warmth on his arms, and the buzzing feeling in his head. The words of his mother’s soft tone, cascading over his ear was haunting his mind now. Stay strong… 

“What have I done..?” Levi whispered to no one in particular, tears streaming down his cheeks once again. The guilt was too much; the feelings were overwhelming. His mind was slowly beginning to process what had happened, and it hit Levi’s mind like a bullet. No… He couldn’t give up now… But, this proves Levi was weak. Weak… Jean’s voice came into Levi’s head again, making him cringe. Levi could only imagine what Jean would say and do if Jean saw him like this… His cruel face laughing, taunting, calling him a weak emo freak… 

A spark of pain flushed through Levi’s head once again, a small whimper of pain escaping his lips; which were paler than normal. Levi… was dying… alone… It was like a nightmare, and Levi couldn’t wake up this time…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super short, shh. They get longer, (I Think.) 
> 
> Congratulations on reading another depressing chapter. Things get better I promise. Cheers! 
> 
> Hopefully I finished ALL of this by your birthday, you dork. ;-; See you later, senpai.


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren finds Levi in his dreadful state. 911 is called, tears are shed, and Levi's fate weighs in Eren's hands. Will it be too late? *Insert Dramatic Music Here.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: Once again, I don't own AoT or any of the characters. 
> 
> Wow. I'm surprised there's a good amount of reads. Thank you all for reading, and maybe... Drop a comment for the birthday boy? Lmao. Cheers! Hope you enjoy the update! 
> 
> P.S: Did you know work sucks? 
> 
> P.S.S: Happy Birthday, Senpai. *^*

Please, don’t let it be too late!! Eren pounded desperately on the front door now, but there was still no noise from inside. Dang it, Levi! Why did you lock the door?! Sobbing in frustration, hot tears running down his cheeks once again, Eren pounded harder. No! Please, be okay! Eren was frantic now, his wide and wild teal eyes scanning the outside of the house. Scanning his eyes over the old looking white wood, Eren spotted exactly what he needed to spot; a window. 

Eren moved like lightning at that point, his feet thudding softly in the dry grass, until he lunged at the window in a desperate manner, eyes even more filled with worry. “Levi!” Eren screamed, the tears more frequent now, and his entire body trembling. Frick! He needed to open that dang window!! With desperate movements, Eren tugged at the window latch as hard as he could, gritting his teeth together in concentration. Crap… The window was closed tightly… Eren was growling in frustration, tugging harder, and harder, and harder at the window. Come on! Please, open! Eren’s ears picked up something then; something that made him work even harder. Levi… Levi was whimpering in pain. Eren let out a yell, tugging as hard as he could now. He could feel the adrenaline pumping through his body, filling up all his blood streams, every part of his brain… were pumping with the adrenaline. Levi! Levi! Levi! With one last yell, Eren yanked the window open with a loud thunk, his breath ragged from all the excretion of his body. “Levi!” Eren yelled again, crawling frantically over the window sill, cursing under his breath. 

The glass was digging into his knees and thighs now, but Eren didn’t care. Eren was determined. No matter how much pain he had to go through, Eren had to save Levi. Tumbling through the entrance of the window, Eren’s teal eyes were wide as he took in the scene.

Eren was in the bathroom now… And Levi—oh god, Levi…

Levi looked terrible, and the sight brought Eren to weep. “Levi… Levi, oh my god…” Eren breathed, his knees trembling now. His knees felt like jelly, and his feet felt like they were stuck to the ground. No… Levi…  
Levi’s skin was pale, with a small bead of sweat on his forehead, black straight hair strewn over one half of his face, one messy strand in the middle of his nose. Levi’s lips were parted, but at least his chest was moving. That was the good part, and Eren couldn’t help but be relieved. His arms were limp at his sides, long bleeding gashes up and down his arms, looking as if they were self-inflicted. 

Eren sobbed again, placing a shaking hand over his mouth. The sight was too much for him to bear… His heart had become heavy with guilt at this point, and felt like it weighed a million pounds. The sight was maddening, in the least. To say Levi looked bad, or sick, was an understatement. Levi looked like death.

Once Eren forced himself to move again, Eren scrambled past the sink and the toilet, tumbling down to his knees, next to his old best friend. “Levi… Please be alive…” Eren choked out, a wet sob escaping his lips, quivering at the same time. At that point, the brunette lifted a hand to brush it across Levi’s cheek. “Please…” He breathed once again. Please, God… If you’re real… save Levi…

Eren froze. Levi’s chest moved, and his lidded eyes slowly opened. His eyes were dull gray this time, and weak. It seemed like Levi couldn’t keep his eyes open much longer… It was disheartening to Eren, but this time the teal eyed boy sobbed in relief. Levi was alive… 

“…E…Eren…” Levi choked out, his tone wispy and weaker than before. Levi felt like he was drunk at this point, his tone slurred and slow. Eren… Eren was here… Weakly, Levi reached out a bloodied hand to the brunette, desperately clutching onto his shirt. Eren was actually here… He came… He was actually real… Levi was surprised, but there was no way he could express it in this state. Levi just didn’t have the energy. 

Eren was stricken for a moment, his eyes filling with a new set of tears. Oh, Levi… Eren’s very heart and soul were shattering from his best friends actions, and when Levi clutched Eren’s shirt… Eren couldn’t take it anymore. There was no way in heaven nor hell that Eren would ever let this happen again. That’s the vow Eren made right there, while pulling the injured man back into him. As Eren leaned against the wall, Eren let Levi’s head lay in his lap, staring down at the raven haired male with teary eyes.  
Never again would Levi feel an urge to hurt himself… Eren would make sure of it, no matter what he had to do. Eren loved Levi. Eren… loved… Levi. As foreign as the words were in the brunettes mind, they made sense. The fact Eren craved to be with Levi every second of the day, and how much he was messily sobbing over Levi. Frankly, Eren probably wouldn’t cry this much over anyone else, unless it was Mikasa or his mother, Carla. The puzzle pieces fit together there, and Eren couldn’t deny it. Eren missed him once he was pried away; it felt like a piece of his heart was gone. Levi… It was mostly about Levi. His wonderful smile that Eren oh so much missed, and that soft, crisp laugh that danced across the air like a balled in a theater.  
Thus, because of these feelings, Eren was quick to slide his phone open, as quick as he could, with a shaky hand, dial 911. The sound of the ringer was making Eren’s heart race. Hurry up, hurry up… 

“911, what’s your emergency?” Came the voice of a girl, whom Eren was ever so glad to hear. 

“H-Hi, my best friend… h-he’s dying…” Eren paused to look around the pale style bathroom, his ocean colored eyes landing on exactly what he needed to know, but at the same time… it made his heart sink in his chest. 

Two bottles of pills, completely empty, were lying on the ground by the sink. Eren swallowed thickly to fight back more tears, simply releasing a dry sob from his lips. 

 

“He took two full bottles of pills… Prozac, and another one with the label crossed off…” Eren choked out, stifling another set of tears from leaving his wide eyes. 

“Yes, sir. We’ll be right there. I found your location on the GPS.” The lady explained, before continuing. “Please stay calm.” The lady finished, her tone lightly struck with concern. 

Eren could only swallow, even that action hard to do with all the tears building up, what felt like a rock laden in his throat, and it wouldn’t move. The feeling was something Eren hadn’t felt in a long time, and it was nowhere near a pleasant experience. The last time he had felt this much sadness… it was when his father had left his mom and Eren himself. The thing that made Eren feel even remorseful, was the fact Levi was there for him after Girsha left. Eren simply abandoned Levi in his interval of need… It brought another fresh set of tears to sill from his green-blue eyes, dripping over his chin to delicately land on Levi’s cheeks beneath him. 

Levi had flinched ever so slightly as something wet hit his cheeks, ashen eyes, with great struggle, slowly parted open. The scene in front of his eyes was blurry, making Levi’s pounding headache even worse. Eren was crying… The sight to the raven made his heart feel like it was completely shattered now. Though his brain was fuzzy, and frankly shutting down, Levi was able to frown, wearily and shakily lifting his left hand to touch Eren’s cheek, as the boy had done for him a moment ago. With his weary steel eyes, Levi stared at Eren, hoping to say what he wanted to though his eyes. The message was simple in one aspect, but so full of emotions in the resulting aspect. ‘Don’t cry… I want to see you happy,’ Was the message Levi sent with his eyes, before letting his hand slip back to the floor, weary eyes not able to be kept open anymore. Death was peaceful, Levi decided. It was like falling into a deep sleep… All your worries disappear, along with everything else about you. Levi smiled. The smile was something so sad, so tiny, and so unbelievably full of his emotions, Eren had to stifle another sob. 

Eren’s heart felt like it had just been torn in half when Levi touched his cheek, those perfect colored steel eyes gazing right at Eren, like he was trying to say something with his eyes. Eren was too distraught to think much about it, but he had to admit, the very touch of Levi calmed his heart from about-to-have-a-heart-attack to a simple I’m-going-to-have-a-panic-attack rate. It was an impactful change of rate to Eren. 

“Levi… Stay with me, please… They’re almost here, please.” Eren said, tone frantic but quiet, eyes stuck at the older boy who rested in his lap. Levi looked so weak, and it was tearing Eren apart inside. With a nervous sigh at Levi’s silence, the brunette hesitantly placed his hand where Levi’s heart was. 

 

Thump.  
Thump.  
Thump.

 

Eren couldn’t hide the breath of relief that left his lips, but it was short circuited. His heart beat was getting slower by the minute… Please, hurry up! Eren mentally begged for the ambulance to hurry, quicker, quicker, quicker! It felt like every second was an hour now, the droning of Levi’s heart in the background starting to slowly fade away, the raven’s skin paling even more. Eren sobbed, running his free hand to brush back Levi’s midnight hair away from his closed eyes, and his ‘sleeping’ face. 

The minutes passed, but they felt to be as slow as molasses at that point, the steady click, click, and chime of the clock louder, louder, and louder… Eren’s body was trembling harder now, and his wild eyes were still fixated on Levi. All Eren could do at this point was desperately hold Levi against him, breath ragged and cut short from the amount of sobbing that he had been doing. Please… Please, be alive, Levi… Eren’s shaky hands clutched at the raven’s shoulders tighter now, letting Levi’s head slump onto his own shoulder. Anything, please… I’ll do anything… Just let him live. Eren let another dry sob escape his lips, though no more tears came. Eren felt as if he had cried out his entire supply of water anyways. Eren couldn’t escape the guilt now, and the condemned memories of his dark mind… 

oOoOoOoOoOo

Laughter was all the brunette could hear, and all of the cafeterias attention was diverted to the saddest thing in history, according to Eren. 

Levi was soaked, the cruel boy named Jean towering over the shorter boy, his caramel eyes almost on fire with a dark sense of humor hidden deep within the sadistic part of him. Eren had never cared for Jean, but now… Eren wanted to tear the boy to shreds. However, Eren couldn’t do that. He was stuck; covered in popularity and fake status, to the point it ran Eren’s life. Why was he so obsessed about being popular? Eren didn’t even know anymore. The thing that were happening to his old best friend… They always made him cringe, and now that was one of those times. 

Levi was soaked in what had been Jean’s cold water for Football Practice. Eren wasn’t exactly sure why Jean had dumped it on him, but then again, jean didn’t need a reason; he was just cruel that way. Levi’s raven hair was slicked down across his face, his facial features twisted up into something of coldness, and fear, but mixed in at the same time with this daring bravery that Eren oh so admired. Eren could see the way Levi shivered, and his jaw clenched. Eren could see the way Jean was enjoying every moment, and his lips were upturned into something of a very cruel sneer. 

“Pftt! You look even more pathetic than usual! What are you going to do, emo freak? Bleed on me?” Jean said with a cruel bark of laughter, everyone in the cafeteria but about five people, including Eren, laughed along with the cruel jock.  
Levi had set his jaw even tighter, swinging his fist at Jean. 

The cafeteria had gone silence at the deafening crack of Jean’s nose. Obviously Levi had done some serious damage; seeing by the way Jean had howled like a wounded animal, clutching his nose instantly. The smell of metal filled the air, and crimson drips hit the pale white and gray cafeteria floor. 

Levi was deathly silent for a moment, his ashen eyes staring at Jean, almost like he was frozen in place. Eren wanted to scream for Levi to stop, wanted to scream that Jean’s jocks were sneaking up behind him… But all he could do was lock eyes with his old friend, desperately trying to convey a meaning. Though, Levi seemed stiff as a board still, staring at his fist now. 

“That’s what I’ll do.” Levi said finally, his tone low and filled with danger. However, his pride was soon destroyed by a fist meeting the side of Levi’s skull. 

Eren cold hear Levi’s breath waver, and his balance fall out of accord, his body tumbling sideways into the hard ground. Levi released a grunt of pain, his ashen eyes wide in pain, a trickle of blood sliding down his forehead. 

One of Jean’s friends, Marco, was the one that hit him, a growl leaving his lips. “Oh, will you?” Marco sneered, his leg swinging back in a flash to connect with Levi’s frail side, a cry of pain leaving Levi’s blood stained lips, coughing in hysterics at this point. Marco threw back his head to let out a loud burst of laughter. “Come on, weakling! Show us what you got!” Marco instantly regretted saying that. 

Levi, laying in a puddle of his own blood, got to his knees, raven hair hanging over his dark eyes, though they were still directed at Marco, as Levi began to rapidly but in a raspy tone, curse him out, lunging forward. Levi’s nails made contact with one of Marco’s eyes, as if Levi himself was a caged animal. 

Marco screamed. The scream was loud, gurgled, and strained with every inch of breath he had. It was blood curdling, and made Eren shiver. He wanted to shout for Levi to stop, more of Jean’s friends will come, but the words didn’t come. They were stuck in his throat, unable to leave his dry vocal cords. 

Levi even looked like a caged animal now. His raven hair was messily strewn across his face, eyes glimmering deep and dark, through struck with an edge of pain that shown evident to everyone. Blood trickled down his forehead and neck, along with from the corner of his mouth, and his side looked like pure crap. Eren could tell by the way he was leaning on the opposite side of his body, one leg bent like he couldn’t barely support himself anymore. Levi looked beaten and scared. Eren imagined it was like this with Kenny too… Levi was taught to fight, never give up, no matter what condition his body was in. Even though Levi looked like he crawled up from the very pits of hell itself, he raised his fists, stepping with one leg back. He seemed to scan his eyes over Jean; whom was clutching his nose, then Marco; whom was clutching his eye, his screams still filling the school, everyone else silent as death himself. It was as if no one dared to move from their seats, jaw hanging open, all eyes wide and wild. Even Eren himself found his own eyes to be wide, unable to leave Levi’s face and the way his body was positioned. 

“Try me.” Levi said, his tone cold, but monotone besides the shiver that radiated across the room from his tone. His ashen eyes burned with something that Eren couldn’t recognize at first, but he finally picked it up. Fear, and paranoia. It was like the time Levi was being beaten by Kenny. Eren could only imagine the intensity of Levi’s flash backs right now… Guilt was consuming Eren once again, making him hang his head. He couldn’t watch anymore… The group was surrounding Levi… All Eren heard after that was screams, bones crushing, coughing, gagging, and fists connecting to bodies.  
Eren’s head swarm.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi gets taken to the hospital, while Eren is internally flipping out.

Sirens, Eren could hear the sirens now, bolting him out of his phase of memories. Eren was rushed with the feeling of thankfulness, holding Levi tighter to him. Please… Please… Stay with me… Eren silently continued to pray, resting his head gently on top of Levi’s. Anything to feel closer to Levi was what he needed right now. Eren needed his best friend! Tch! 

“Where are you?!” Came the yell of a medic, along with the door busting down. Thank god. Splinters of the door scattered delicately against the pale ground, making the brunette wince from the sound. 

“The bathroom!” Eren called as loud as he could, body still trembling. Eren couldn’t calm down… Until Levi was okay, Eren refused to stop worrying. Eren wouldn’t sleep until he was okay. And, if Levi died… That thought brought the lump back into Eren’s throat. No, he couldn’t think about that right now. Eren might as well just go insane if that happened. Eren wouldn’t be able to live with himself if that ever happened, let alone if it was today; being Eren’s fault… Another tear spilled over Eren’s soft lashes, dripping on the raven haired boy’s back now, leaving a single darker area on his black shirt. Levi... He couldn't lose him now... Dammit! He refused!

The door shook then, and the door was heaved open, two men with a foldable stretcher standing there, face masks on. “Just he’s injured, right? You're okay” The man asked Eren, cautious. 

Eren nodded his head hurriedly, sniffling ever so softly. “Yes.” He replied, softly stating to set Levi up. “Please, hurry! His heartbeat… I can barely hear it anymore.” Eren explained, sobs leaving his dry lips. “Please.” He begged once again.   
The medics shot into action then, carefully lifting Levi into their arms, before laying him on the stretcher. It even heard to watch... The agony of watching his best friend in this condition... And Eren wasn't even able to apologize for any of it yet, to a consious Levi, that is. At that moment, it felt like everything shattered. An icicle, dangling delicately from the room. It was beautiful, shone brightly.. Then just... snapped, tumbling from the roof to smash into a thousand pieces against the cold ground... That's how it felt. 

 

“Cara! Stitch his arms up before he bleeds to death!” Barked one medic. 

“Yes, sir!” Came the response. 

Eren’s head felt fuzzy as he stood, and his body felt cold now, from the lack of touch from Levi. No… Eren had to come along, Levi had no one else. Scurrying after the medics, and Levi, laying pale in the stretcher, Eren watched with wide eyes as they lifted him into the ambulance.His legs felt like jelly as he scrambled forward once more, swaying this time. “Wait!!” Eren yelled, jogging to meet the vehicle, tone frantic. “Please! I’m all he has right now! Let me come!” Eren practically begged, whilst tears streamed down his cheeks. 

One medic spun to face the boy, frowning. “Fine, jump on up. Just stay out of the way.” The medics warned, and Eren instantly complied, not even waiting a second before jumping onto the tailgate.

Eren scrambled to get into the ambulance, pushing himself in the desolate corner of the back, watching with fearful eyes as the medic named Cara stuck a needle into Levi’s wounds, hooking him up to an IV. It was smart, Eren reasoned. Levi had lost a ton of blood… Considering Eren’s red sweatshirt was more of a brown now… The looks of his own sweatshirt made Eren cringe. Watching carefully, and protectively as Cara began to stitch up Levi’s open wounds, Eren pressed himself farther into the corner to allow more space for the medics to work. After all, Eren would do anything for Levi to survive; anything at all. 

As the doors slammed closed, the light was turned on, and the ambulance shot forward, Eren felt his stomach lurch as well. Never had he ever been in a vehicle that was moving this quickly… It was somewhat terrifying, and make Eren’s insides feel like mush. the brunette had to hold onto the metal bars on the sides of the vehicle walls just to stay standing; it was wretched. 

Seeing Levi be pricked with needed, being put on at least two IV’s and a pump of blood… It made Eren feel like pure crap. To consider he thought this was all his own fault, the guilt was just eating him apart. The guilt gnawed at his sides, stomach, intestines… It all made him feel sick to his stomach, his skin clammy now, and the feeling of cold sweat made his skin crawl with disgust. It was all too much, mixed with the nervousness… It wasn’t a good mix, at all, to be frank. 

As the ambulance swerved, and Cara cursed under her breath, steadying her hand with the needle, Eren stared at Levi. He simple couldn’t take his eyes off of him. Eren was too dang worried… His mind was falling apart shreds now, his hands trembling and shaking. He couldn’t handle this… Eren bit his lip, carefully watching as a tube was set in Levi’s mouth. What the heck was that for? Eren was immediately disgusted as vomit spilled into the tube, and Eren had to look at the ground, shaking even harder at this point. Right… They had to flush his system out… After all, he swallowed all of those pills… Eren frowned, staring at his scuffed up Van tennis shoes. Please, just be better…Eren closed his eyes after a moment, swaying along with the movements of the vehicle.   
“Stable. Let’s get him in! Sir, we need you to come with us and answer some questions.” Cara said, her green eyes shining with concern as she spoke to Eren, trying to not stumble as the vehicle screeched to a stop, the other male medics immediately jumping out the back door, sliding down the stretcher from the ambulance, careful to keep all the medical supplies still hooked up. Cara followed next, pushing the sets of IV’s behind them. 

Nodding as quickly as he could, Eren leapt out after the group, trying not to immediately fall to his knees. His body felt like jelly from all the nervousness in his mind… Come on, Eren… Keep it together… You can do this… As quickly as he could, Eren scrambled after the group of medics, eyes widening as they stepped inside the hospital. 

The place… Was huge… No wonder it was the best hospital in the U.S… Eren skittered after the group again, mentally scolding himself for getting distracted. Don’t do that, Eren! Not now! 

“In here! Dr. Moosa! He needs a full transmission flush, immediately. It was Prozac and some high dose pain pills.” Cara said, hurriedly pushing Levi into the room, stopping to face Eren, letting the other medics set up the room.   
It was chaos in the room now, doctors running in and out, desperately working on Levi… The sight made Eren want to cry again.

“I need you to stay out here, okay? I’ll ask you some questions… Let’s get you a seat.” Cara explained slowly, softly taking the boys arm to lead him to a set of chairs, unhooking a clipboard from next to it.

Eren had no complaints at that. Anything for Levi… Besides, a seat sounded amazing right now. Eren needed it, and he knew it from the fact his knees were trembling and weak, along with the rest of his body. Eren carefully sat down in the green chair, teal eyes scanning the pale walls, doctors running around in their scrubs, ears picking up only small bits of pieces of the frantic shouting. And this… This right here was why Eren didn’t think he could ever be a doctor. Girsha was one… But, Eren didn’t know if he still was. Eren hadn’t seen him for years, and as sad as it was, Eren was number about the topic than anything. It didn’t matter anymore, compared to the rest of what was going on. At least Annie was gone now, and Eren was fortunate enough to be gaining Levi back. Eren just hoped, no, prayed that Levi would forgive him. That was his only wish at the moment, besides the obvious one of that Levi would survive all this. Eren crossed his legs, for good measure, hoping it would control the shaking. Sadly, it didn’t.   
Cara was watching the brunette with an observant look at this point, sitting down quietly next to him. Her blonde bob hair cut was messed up now, obviously hectic from the running and pushing the four IV carriers, along with the stress of being a first responder. Eren simply couldn’t imagine the pressure these people went through… even now, he couldn’t take it, hence the fact he didn’t know how anyone could. It was insane, but so dang heroic, Eren respected all doctors, even his cruel father, as much as he didn’t want to admit it. 

“What’s your name, sir?” The cool voice came from the messied nurse, her tooth sank into her lower lip from concentration. 

“Eren. Eren Jeager,” Eren murmured, tugging nervously on his sleeves. Levi would be okay… Eren had a smidge of faith that was keeping him above water. Reluctantly, Eren forced his eyes away from the room his friend was in, to focus on the green eyed medic named Cara. “I’m sixteen.” Eren added on, sure of the fact that would be one of her questions. 

Cara smiled, a small smile, and nodded. “Thank you. What’s the patients name and age?” She asked, scribbling down what Eren had said before, using a red sharpie. 

“Levi Ackerman… He’s seventeen, his birthday is on Christmas.” Eren said, feeling the tears prick at his eyes again. Eren… Eren hadn’t even said happy birthday to him for the last four years. To attempt and cover his tears, Eren let his hair fall into his eyes.   
The blonde nodded once again, writing that down as well. “What’s your relation to Levi? If you’re not a partner, or family, where would those members be? We need to get direct information.” Cara explained, talking carefully. She truthfully didn’t want to upset Eren, and flat out say, if he was only a friend that he couldn’t stay as much as a partner of family member was able to do. 

Eren hesitated. Frick… What should he tell them? If Eren said he was only a friend… He wouldn’t be able to stay… “Partner. His sister is on a business trip.” Eren spit out finally, his stomach churning at his own lie. Oh god, what would Levi think of that if he survived to hear it? Eren and Levi in a relationship? Levi would probably flip out… Frick, Eren would have to work hard to hide the fact of what he said. “Kay Ackerman is his sister... His mother is dead,” Eren winced. “…and his father raped and abused him, so… He’s not around, nor do they want him to be around.” Eren spat, his tone bitter from the mention of Kenny Ackerman. The very thought of what Levi’s alleged ‘father’ did to him was enough to make Eren hunt the very man down and crush him to pieces. If Eren ever saw that man… he would pay. Eren would make sure of it. 

Repeating the same actions as before, Cara nodded. “I see. What’s his father’s name?” Cara asked, glancing at the brunette once again. 

“Kenny Ackerman.” Eren said, his tone even more bitter than before, venom snaked into his words. That name… It disgusted Eren, and made his insides clench. 

Cara scribbled that down next. “Alright. I’m going to check out Levi’s past medical records, you stay here, okay? If you need, the bathrooms are down the hall…” Cara paused to motion to a long white hall. “The food and drink machines are over there as well.” Cara said with a hint of a smile before standing from the chair, holding her clipboard to her chest, spinning on her heel to quickly walk towards what Eren assumed was the main office, where all the medical records were kept. 

Eren watched in silence, hesitantly turning his gaze back to the room in front of him. Tch… Eren couldn’t see anymore… They had covered the windows. That made Eren even more nervous… Water, Eren decided. That would be a good idea, and get his mind off things for a while… Carefully standing from the soft chair, Eren adverted his eyes to the floor, slowly starting to walk. 

The floor was a bland and simple white and gray pattern of tiles, the walls equally a pale white, maybe even with a hint of yellow. Eren was too nervous to really focus on the colors. It was just a blur to him at the moment. His feet making small pounding sounds against the floor was the only thing keeping him going. The sounds of beeping soon filled his ears, making Eren look forward as he reached the corner. Rooms… There were so many dang hospital rooms… As he walked by the plain brown doors, Eren made a mental list. 

Room 113, Amanda Ledda. Eren could hear coughing and wheezing from that room, making his shoulders stiffen up. He could only imagine what Levi would have said right now… ‘Germs everywhere, brat. We’re surrounded.’ Eren imagined Levi saying, the thought of Levi’s ashen eyes opening and the words wee enough to bring a watery smile to the boys face. 

Room 115, Felicia De’Claire. From that room, Eren heard silence, only the small humming of a muffled TV to be heard. Eren prayed silently that the patient was only sleeping, and didn’t pass in her sleep. His prayers… weren’t answered… The shrill shriek of a machine in the woman’s room made Eren jump, skittering away from the room and into the opposite wall. Did Eren… just experience another death? A group of doctors and nurses sprinting down the hall verified his thoughts, along with the droning sound of the machine.

The world… was so cruel… How could God let people die like this?! Why was this world so dang merciless?! Another set of tears found their way to escape from the teal eyed boy, spilling down his cheeks. All he could do was stop and stare at the moment, the sound of weeping filling his ears. Eren reluctantly turned towards the sound. A mother and a child… Both were crying, the brown haired girl crying in hysterics, hugging the mirror image of her, only older; whom Eren assumed was her mother. Felicia… That must have been the little girl’s grandmother… Eren swallowed thickly, forcing himself to keep walking. This happens all the time, Eren told himself, forcing the tears to stop. People die, people get beat, people get raped, people commit suicide, and people make others commit suicide… This world was hell, and Eren had been living in it all this time. There was no more denying it anymore. Eren had to accept the fact that the world wasn’t as perfect as Hollywood made it seem, all the fancy movies… Where everyone lived after a dramatic injury… That wasn’t reality. Nor were the love movies they made anywhere near reality. Love was hard, and cruel. Eren knew that too, by the way his mother was heartbroken after Girsha left. Love… was a fake thing. Annie and Eren… That wasn’t love. Maybe there wasn’t such a thing as perfect relationships. 

Eren clenched his fists. No, that wasn’t true… Eren loved his mother. Eren loved Levi. Eren loved Kay like a sister of his own. Maybe love wasn’t perfect, but you could work to make it enjoyable, right? Eren just prayed, desperately prayed that Levi would find love. Levi deserved it, Eren thought, as the brimming tears escaped once again. Tch… Eren cursed his mind at this point. Eren cursed the tears that dripped down his cheeks. And finally, Eren cursed all the sympathetic looks he was getting from strangers as he walked, the tears rolling down his cheeks. 

After what seemed like forever of doors, white walls, and staring people, Eren’s eyes skimmed over the men’s bathroom sign, glad it was finally there. Eren pushed the wooden door open, stepping in, closing the door tightly behind him, and locking it. A sob immediately wrenched its way from Eren’s lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure how I felt about this chapter. ;_;   
> Again, sorry if it sucks, Levi. Happy Birthday, senpai. 
> 
> PS: Disclaimer: I don't own Eren, Levi, Jean, Carla, Marco, Annie, Mikasa, or Armin.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren has a moment of sadness, and yeah. Depressing. Oops.

The tears were freely spilling over the boy’s cheeks now, dripping against the white tile floors. Eren was thankful for one thing at least—the bathrooms were private, not rows of stalls and people. This was his sanctuary for the moment. Eren sniffled, wiping a shaking hand across his nose and over his eyes. Disgusting… Quit being weak, Eren. Stop crying… One part of him screamed, but it was quickly over ruled by common sense. People need to cry! Tch! Crying isn’t weak! Eren ran a hand through his messy caramel hair, staring in the mirror. He looked like crap, and he knew it. Eren just needed a moment… Just a moment to calm down… That’s it… Taking a deep breath, Eren grabbed a strand of toilet paper, blowing his nose softly. 

 

Levi’s body felt like it was on fire. He wanted to scream, but no noise came. Where was he? What was happening?! The last thing Levi remembered was Eren… Eren actually being there for him, holding him… If Levi was able to cry at the moment, he would probably be wailing by now. The pain was unimaginable; Levi’s whole body screamed in pain. It was too the point his whole body was trembling. As much as Levi tried to open his eyes, they simply wouldn’t open. Was he knocked out? No, Levi could feel the pai—Levi felt the urge to scream again, as something dug into his stomach, and warmth spread over his body. What was that?! Levi could feel a tear escape his closed eyes. Levi couldn’t even control the tears at this point… He had to be at the hospital, right? Or was this hell? The thought made Levi’s body chill internally, until the pain sparked again, this time once again in his stomach. Tch! It hurt so badly! T-Tch! This… This was the second worst pain he had ever felt, Levi reasoned. The first and always first, would be that day with Kenny… Levi mentally winced, though all thoughts of Kenny disappeared as pain shoot up his arms, his entire body still now. He didn’t even have the strength to tremble anymore… 

It felt like he was in hell, but according to what Kay used to say about it, it wasn’t this. She said it would be eternally dark, and he would always be in pain… Yet, Levi could barely make out the feeling of something somewhat soft beneath him. Satan wasn’t that kind, was he? After all, it wasn’t like Satan would simply let everyone lounge around on a comfy area, and have room service or some crap. And Levi was so sure he wasn’t in heaven. Heaven meant no pain, which was no where near the pain Levi was still feeling, and the sensation of being on fire. Secondly, Levi wouldn’t go to heaven. He was sure about it, no, positive about the fact he wouldn’t go to heaven. Levi had sinned so dang much, surely whatever God was in control wouldn’t allow that, right? Levi wasn’t too sure when it came to religion, but he was practically positive he had gotten that fact correct. 

Once again, the pain coursed through his body. But, this time, it was much worse. To Levi’s surprise, a scream actually did leave his lips, and his ashen eyes shot open. Levi… was awake, and in the hospital. 

Doctors were swarmed around his body. To be more specific, around his stomach. What was happening..? 

“Patient is awake!” One doctor with a scrub over her face called out, tone frantic.

“Sedate him again!” 

Before Levi could protest, a mask was strapped across his face. With ashen eyes wide and wild, he got a glimpse that made him pass out even quicker than the gas would have ever done. His stomach… Was cut open, and they were operating on his stomach. Blood gushed out of the wound, over the doctor’s hands, tools… everywhere. His organs were plain to be seen, along with the slits made in his very organs and tissue of his stomach. Though… his stomach looked to be a weird color; not like a normal stomach should be. 

That… That was why Levi slipped back into unconsciousness, fully out, his head hitting the pillow beneath him almost instantly following what his eyes saw. 

 

Eren flinched at the sound of the scream. Crap! He knew that sound too well; that painful, panicked sound of pain… It could only come from one person… Levi. As quick as he could, Eren finished snatching the water bottle from the machine, before taking off running. “Levi!” Eren yelled, his vans pounding against the tiles as he ran, hair swishing messily over his eyes; back and forth, back and forth. “Levi!” Eren repeated, almost in hysterics. Please! Don’t let that be his dying scream! Let him be okay! What the heck were the doctors even doing to him?! Eren was desperate to find out, sprinting as fast as he could down the pale hallway, until he came to the familiar surgery room. Right… Surgery… Oh, god, Levi didn’t wake up during it, did he?! Eren’s heart was pounding like a friggin’ rabbit’s heart now, making his breath come out ragged and uneven once again. Skidding to a stop outside the door, Eren desperately reached for the door handle. 

His reach fell short by a body tugging him away, gently, but quickly. “Eren! Stop! He’ll be fine!” Came a way to familiar voice, making the brunette spin around to look.

Mikasa… Eren’s eyes filled with tears once again. “Casa..? How did you..?” Eren was confused, and his head swarm. How did Mikasa know about Levi..? 

Mikasa’s gentle steel eyes met Eren’s. “Kay called me. She told me you sounded like you were about to have a panic attack,” Mikasa said bluntly, a frown hitting her pink lips, half hidden under her purple scarf. “What happened..?” Mikasa asked hesitantly, lifting the edge of her scarf to wipe Eren’s tears away from his cheeks. 

Eren stifled a sob, hanging his head to let his caramel hair drape over his teal eyes. “… I found him in the bathroom… He took two whole bottles o-of pills,” Eren stuttered out weakly. “and his arms… were covered in cuts.” Eren said, his voice sounding weaker and tinier than ever before, as if he was a kid again, trying to tell his father goodbye. 

Mikasa’s frown grew at her brothers words, brushing a piece of her own raven hair away from her eyes. “That’s terrible… You should be here with him, okay?” Mikasa asked, shifting on her opposite heel. “Mum already said it was fine.” She explained. 

Eren wiped his eyes harshly, only pausing to glance at his sister. Mom said it was okay? Eren was shocked at this fact, not even able to finish processing it in his mind. “Really?” Eren asked, perking up about two percent, though it was still an impact. That would be amazing… To finally make up for all the time Eren hadn’t been there for his friend… Now he could be. It was practically a perfect scenario, if you ignored the fact Levi was in the hospital, and it was originally, no, mostly Eren’s fault. That part still gnawed at Eren’s mind, thus, his shoulders were still slumped, and his eyes looked even more drained than his eyes looked if someone woke him up at four am. Eren felt even more drained than ever before, and he truthfully just wanted a nap. But, Eren promised himself he wouldn’t sleep until Levi was awake, and okay. 

Mikasa’s lips upturned into a sad smile, nodding her head. “Yes.” She said, brushing another piece of hair behind her ears. “Mum said Levi at least deserved your company… She wanted me to stay too, and keep an eye on you.” 

That made Eren groan. “Casa, I’m fine! I’m sixteen!” Eren insisted stubbornly, wiping his eyes once more. At least the tears stopped for now… Eren was thankful for that, in the least. Sighing, Eren ran a hand through his disheveled hair, trying to make it look better, but frankly, Eren knew that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. 

Mikasa sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. “Fine. If I stay in the hotel room next door, would that be better? I’ll only check on you once a day.” Mikasa said, eyes sharp. Eren knew that was the best he would get, considering those eyes… Those eyes were enough to make Eren want to cower. They reminded him so much of Levi’s eyes… Yet there was something more in Levi’s eyes, something better. This certain twinkle… 

Shaking away his thoughts, and attempting to swallow another lump that was forming in his throat, Eren sighed too. “Fine.” He reluctantly agreed, though his facial features were still obvious that he wanted less; his jaw set, stubborn. 

Mikasa smiled then, something that was rare to see. “Good. I’ll see you tomorrow for lunch, okay? Oh, I already paid for you to eat three meals a day.” Mikasa explained, a twinkle of concern still shining in her silver eyes. 

Eren groaned. Three meals a day?! And why did Mikasa pay for it?! “Whatever.” Eren said, sighing again for good measure. It felt only right to sigh at something like that. 

“Here.” With that, Mikasa shoved a food card into his hand, before turning on her heel, black hair swaying as she walked. “Be safe. Eat.” Mikasa reminded him, stopping to glance back at him once, before proceeding to turn down the hallway. 

Eren frowned, staring at the blue card in his hand. A food card, huh? Like Mikasa could make him eat three meals a day… Eren scoffed, though he shoved the card into his pocket. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, he was once again thankful for his sister. Eren barely had enough money to get this water, and when he got hungry… Eren would need food. 

Glancing back at the surgery door, Eren frowned a bit more, reluctantly sitting back in the chair he was in previously. After all, he had nothing better to do… Resting his head back against the wall, Eren blankly stared at the pale ceiling and sets of yellow lights, letting the nervousness take him over again. Eren did all he could to stay awake after that moment. Whether it was tapping his scuffed Vans against the floor, drumming his fingers against the side of the chair, or blinking rapidly, Eren was determined to stay awake. For Levi, Eren reminded himself. Just a few more hours, Eren told himself.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi finally awakes, and there's a bit of fluff in this one. Did I mention I'm terrible with summaries?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. Life sucks, so updates may take longer. I'm super sorry, and hope you enjoy this chapter even though it's small. Again, Happy Birthday, Levi, and I hope you enjoy this. Love you, Tree. ~
> 
> DISCLAIMER ONCE AGAIN: I do not own Attack On Titan, or else I would not be currently living in hillbilly hell. :')

Four hours. That’s how long the surgery lasted, and the entire time, Eren was a nervous wreck. He simply couldn’t sit still anymore, tapping his fingers, then feet. It was screwing him up so badly, to the point Eren was twitching. First it was his eye, coming out of nowhere. Then it was his hand, twitching badly. Eren swore up and down he was going insane now. It felt like he was in a friggin’ Eminem song… Eren didn’t know if he should be scared, or depressed. Either way, he came to census that it wasn’t good.   
Tapping his fingers against the arm rest, Eren huffed out a breath. Two am. Eren was so dang close to falling asleep, but he wouldn’t let himself. 

That’s when the door opened. 

Eren’s eyes shot open, wide, but tired teal eyes met the doctor who stepped out. Eren was instantly mortified. The doctor was covered… In Levi’s blood. Eren visibly paled. Oh god, please let him be okay. 

“Levi is okay now, you can come see him. He should wake up soon.” The doctor said, a faint smile hidden under his face mask. “If he needs anything, press the emergency button, a doctor or nurse will be there shortly. And please, don’t touch anything, or let him take off the IV’s.” The doctor said sternly, his blue eyes almost like daggers into Eren, making Eren shrink back against the chair. 

“A-Alright.” Eren hesitantly agreed, swallowing thickly. Jeez, that doctor was terrifying… Watching as the group of doctors and nurses walked out, all covered in some of Levi’s blood, Eren carefully stood. Crap… That was a lot of blood… Once the medics were away from the room, Eren scurried into it desperately, letting the door softly close behind him. 

Eren’s heart lifted at what he saw inside, though the guilt wasn’t nearly gone. Levi was carefully nestled into the hospital bed, raven hair cascaded over his eyes. His pale pink lips were half parted, small breaths coming out, his chest rising and falling softly. Levi looked so peaceful… That was, until Eren remembered the IV’s that were stuck into his arms, and the stitches that would be on his body. Eren was somewhat curious where the stitches were. Frowning, Eren approached Levi’s sleeping body, softly sitting on the edge of the soft hospital bed. For one of the beds in the hospital, it was actually pretty nice. 

Eren’s teal eyes cascaded over Levi’s face, softly biting his lip. God, Eren was nervous. Would Levi forgive him for all this..? Eren prayed that he did. It would kill him inside if he didn’t, but at the same time, Eren knew he didn’t deserve to be forgiven. Eren did a crap thing, and that wasn’t acceptable, no matter who it was too. It only multiplied from the fact it was Levi. Levi was his best friend! Tch! The guilt was eating at his stomach and mind again, a single tear sliding down his cheek.

 

Levi was so tired… After the doctors murmured to him that it was okay, he could sleep now, Levi practically passed out. His eyes were heavy, oh so heavy…The idea of sleep had never been so more intoxicating to think about until now. The idea of just sleeping for days… Levi almost smiled at the idea, but instead he let himself fall asleep. No dreams came to the boy when he slept, and the time he slept was as least an hour. 

Something woke him up, though. It was the simple soft creak of his door opening. Ngh? Who was that? Another doctor or nurse? Levi realized his thoughts were false once there was something next to him. Something… Warm. The person smelled like… Blood, and cinnamon… Eren… Levi knew that cinnamon smell… Something wet his cheek at that moment, making his lips curl into a frown. Eren was crying again… 

“Tch… Didn’t I tell you to stop crying, Brat?” Levi croaked out, his ashen eyes slowly opening to meet watery teal ones. 

Eren’s breath hitched, and Levi smiled a sad smile. 

“Levi..?” Eren breathed softly as Levi once again lifted his arm, slowly, because of the wires, to once again wipe the tear away. 

“Hmn?” Levi hummed out, softly dropping his hand once he finished. To be truthful, Levi was still shocked that Eren, Eren of all people was right there next to him… It was a nice feeling, to have his old best friend right there… Wait, why wasn’t Annie here? Did Eren finally drop the girl? Levi hoped so, it would be nice to have his old best friend out… Maybe this crap with his anxiety and depression would even drop again… Ah, now that would be a thing of wonder. 

“I’m sorry.” Eren said, a sob following his words, along with another set of fresh tears. “I’m so sorry,” Eren repeated. “I should have never left you for that… ugh… witch.” Eren said between hiccups and sobs, looking even more wrecked than ever before. 

The sight of Eren made Levi frown even more, arms weakly outstretching to bring his friend into a soft hug. The contact felt amazing to Levi, and even brought light tears to his eyes. This… This is what Levi missed. Eren, Levi missed Eren. Everything about him, to be frank. “Shh, I forgive you.” Levi murmured into the brunette’s ear, his own hands shakily rubbing the sobbing boy’s back.

Eren continued to weakly cry into Levi’s shoulder, his weary eyes slowly fluttering closed. You see, Eren missed this too. Heck, he craved this. Eren really needed one of Levi’s hugs, and this… This was perfect. In a matter of five minutes, Eren was just softly breathing, the tears running to a stop. “You scared the living crap out of me, you know that, right?” Eren whispered into the crook of Levi’s neck, eyes still softly closed. 

Levi frowned, resting his tired head on top of Eren’s. God, he missed this… Levi couldn’t even express his happiness from the fact they were friends again, and Annie was gone. “I know. I’m sorry… I thought I was going insane… yah know?” Levi whispered back, letting his own eyes flutter closed. 

“I know. I’m sorry.” Eren said once again, a soft sigh escaping his lips. God, and this was all his fault… The reason why Levi felt this way was because of him… The guilt was terrible, to say in the least. 

“It’s okay…” Levi murmured, his voice becoming softer by the minute. “Eren, will you stay with me?” The raven asked after another moment of silence. Levi couldn’t even express how nervous he was, and how hard it was to ask that question. Levi just craved to be around Eren… He missed him so much, and he could tell Eren felt the same way, and to be frank, Levi was glad the feeling was mutual. 

Eren’s lips curled into a tired smile as Levi’s question. “Of course, Levi. I’ll be here for you the whole time, okay? I promise.” Eren whispered, slowly letting sleep over take him. 

Levi, for the first time in a while, let a real smile glide smoothly up his lips, slowly letting his body fall back into the bed, keeping Eren into him. “Thank you. Goodnight, Eren.” Levi murmured, once again letting his eyes close. 

“Mm, goodnight, Levi.” Eren whispered, softly relaxing into his best friend, though staying gentle, not wanting to hurt him; ever. Eren had done enough in that in the past… Pushing the thoughts away as fast as they came, Eren took a deep breath. “I love you, Levi.” Eren said, though Levi… was fast asleep, a smile painted on his lips, finally content, well deserved after the hell he had just endured. 

No nightmares came that night. Only the soft breathing of Levi, Eren, and the beeping of Levi's moniter were heard. The monitor wasn't terrible. In fact, it reminded Eren that Levi was alive--And this was good.


	10. Chapter Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren and Levi awake to start their first day in the hospital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been working really hard on finishing this. Phew. This is a short chapter, and I hope updates will come faster! I'm currently writing chapter thirteen, and editing the rest. Updates will come soon! Happy Birthday, Levi. Love you, and hold on tight. 
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Must I still say this? I don't own Attack On Titan.

Awaking to the shrill sound of a monitor wasn’t always the best thing to hear in the morning; especially when the person the monitor belonged to was your best friend. 

Eren shot up with a loud yelp escaping his pale lips, wild and wide teal eyes gazing down to meet Levi, whom was fast asleep on the bed. Eren was shocked, and confused, to say in the least. Why was the monitor going off if Levi was asleep? Eren let his lips curl into a soft frown of confusion. Though at the sound of footprints coming down the hall, Eren reluctantly crawled from the bed, sitting numbly into the leather chair hat was conveniently placed right next to the bed, perched up against the wall. Eren was so tired… Though he knew better than to just lay next to Levi. Tch… Even though he told the doctors that he was his partner, Eren didn’t think it would the best idea to practically lay on Levi. 

A burst of guilt hit him then, making his caramel skin pale. Crap… What if Eren was the one to mess up the monitor or stitches?! Eren was mortified at that moment, until the nurse pushed open the door, holding a hand out to the terrified looking Eren.  
“It’s okay, don’t worry. It’s just time for his medicine.” The nurse explained, laughing lightly at how terrified the brunette looked. 

Eren visibly let out a sigh of relief. Oh, thank God… Eren only tiredly nodded, brushing a hand through his messy hair once again. Ugh, he needed a shower. Eren was already covered in blood, and it felt disgusting on his already clammy skin. If Levi was fully himself again, he would have been mortified from all the germs that were laden on both himself and Eren. Levi would have flipped, and the very thought brought a smile to Eren’s tired face, letting his head rest back against the white and yellow tinted walls. Though his eyes didn’t leave Levi, whom was slowly beginning to stir. 

 

The entire world felt hazy to Levi. At one moment, Levi was against something warm, no, something warm was in his arms. Eren, right? Levi smiled in his sleep at the memory of him gaining his best friend back. Eren had really stayed with him… Levi’s heart fluttered, though the feeling was quickly gone, as his body became cold once again. Huh..? Eren moved..? Levi mentally frowned. That’s when the shrill beeping hit his ears. Crap! What the heck was that? The voice of a nurse came into his ears, making his ashen eyes slowly open. “Ngh?” Levi asked, murmuring pure gibberish. His eyes still felt heavy, and his body was sluggish. 

“Don’t sit up.” The nurse said sternly, just before Levi even attempted it. Instead of denying her wishes, Levi stared at the nurse, then let his eyes wander over to the tired looking brunette whom was sitting in the chair by his bed. Levi caught a glimpse of Eren smiling at him, though the smile was weak and weary looking. Eren looked beat; that was for sure. Though, Levi himself felt like he had been in a wretched fight as well. The ironic part was, Levi was fighting himself.

“Medicine time.” The nurse explained, motioning with her free hand to the silver tray in her hand. 

Levi desperately peered at the tray, trying to see what was on top of it. From his current position, all the raven haired boy could see was a roll of gauze, three medicine bottled, which the labels were too small to read, along with scissors and medical tape. Levi mentally groaned. Oh, how fun.

As the nurse set down the silver tray next to the brunette, Levi’s eyes skimmed over in that area once again. At the brunette’s wide eyes, Levi figured there must have been something bad on that tray that he didn’t see. Levi strained to see once more, but stopped as soon as the nurse shot him a warning look. 

“These first.” The nurse explained, delicately twisting open five pills bottles; one by one, before handing Levi seven pills in his hands. 

Levi gulped. All these pills… The memories of his stupid mistake made him cringe, staring at the different colored pills. Tch… You can do this, Levi… As the nurse handed Levi a cup of water in his free hand, Levi tossed three pills into his mouth, chasing it down with water; his ashen colored eyes stuck on the pale ceiling, and the soft light. Swallowing the pills as quick as he could, along with the other four, Levi panted. G-God, maybe he shouldn’t have taken them all that quick… 

Remembering Eren’s struck look from whatever else was on the tray, Levi turned his head to softly ask Eren what was on the tray, but instead, he felt it. A short squeak of pain escaped Levi’s lips, as his now wide eyes hit the long needle in his arm. God, it hurt! The pain was slowly numbing away, but jeez, it still stung like hell itself. The first needle was drawing blood, Levi figured, still hazy, yet he could tell his own blood inside a tube. Suddenly, a secondly needle pricked into his arm, making Levi writhe. Levi cursed aloud this time, spitting and yelling curse words as the fluid was slowly and frankly, painfully into his arm. Though, Levi stopped trashing around when a gentle hand took his own, his ashen eyes meeting teal ones, which were filled with concern and terror. 

“It’s okay, I’m right here. We’ll get through this, together, okay?” Came Eren’s hushed voice, a sad smile curling up his pale lips. 

Levi’s heart thumped once, then twice. “Okay.” He replied in a hushed manner, softly tightening his grip with the boy’s caramel colored hand as the needle plunged deeper, the nurse attempting to give him a good dose of medicine.

Eren had smiled then, though it was still a sad smile. “You’re such a trooper, Levi… Kay would be proud of you right now. I’m proud of you.” Eren murmured, attempting to calm Levi’s racing heart by softly stroking his thumb across the pale boy’s hand.  
Levi was clutching desperately at Eren’s hand now, ashen eyes widened and flickered with fear. “T-thanks.” Levi murmured, though his eyes and mind couldn’t leave the long needle that was now slowly beginning pulled from his arm, only to be replaced with a small piece of cloth, and a long bandage to go around his upper arm. 

Tch… He was officially wrapped almost head to toe in bandages now, and it bugged the living crap out of the raven haired boy. It was insane, to be frank, how much bandage the doctors used. In past incidents, Levi would just use a Band-Aid. He didn’t see why it was so much of a big deal… Though, he didn’t complain. Eren, his best friend, was by his side, and he got free medical treatment. The only part he was regretting would be the talk he would have to have with the psychologist here… Levi gulped at the thought. God, he wasn’t looking forward to that. There he would have to explain why he did it, and his feelings… Ugh. Levi wasn’t ever really good with explaining his feelings, let alone why he did what he did. It was hard for Levi, especially the part where he would have to explain his flashbacks… Levi swallowed thickly once again, eyes catching Eren’s hand in his own once again. Eren… Would Eren be with him, for that part..? Levi wasn’t sure if he wanted him to be there or not, after all… it would be hard to explain all that in front of his once-again best friend, considering Levi knew Eren would feel guilty for it… Then again, Levi wanted him to be there. 

After much thought, Levi still didn’t know. He simply stared blankly at their hands as the nurse blabbered on and on about something. Levi was too zoned out to even hear it at the moment. It had something to do with food and water, he knew that. That thought wasn't exactly pleasant. Just thinking about it, Levi's stomach churned in a non-pleasant way, a breath escaping his lips.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi and Eren eat together, and things seem kinda okay then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally have time for an update. Ew. Sorry for the wait, readers. Chapter Twelve is a long work in progress; being the longest chapter yet. Chapter Eleven is short, I'm sorry.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I don't own AoT or the characters... Obviously. 
> 
> Happy Birthday, Levi.

Eren just hoped Levi liked what he got them. Eren was starving, and he frankly wasn’t sure how much Levi could eat. Thus, Eren ended up with three sushi platters, two hamburgers, and simple Japanese meals with rice bowls. Just for fun, Eren had grabbed chopsticks, which were now stuck between his teeth. It was hard enough to carry five trays at once, after all. Taking a breath, the brunette carefully set down the trays at the table, a proud smile curling up his lips. He actually did it! If it wasn’t for being surrounded by sick people, Eren could have yelled in happiness. Instead, that goofy grin stuck to his lips as he happily plopped down into his chair. Levi was smiling too… that was the best part for Eren to witness. That damned smile… it was a light in the darkness that they both just went through. 

“Levi!~” Eren practically sang, setting the chopsticks down in front of him eagerly. “I got you tons of things to eat! I’m starving,” Eren commented, fingers curling around his own pair of chopsticks. Almost which a child’s aura of happiness, Eren picked up a sushi roll, licking his lips. God, it looked good. Happily, Eren sank his teeth into it, proceeding to happily munch. Even at home food wasn’t this good… 

 

Yep, that snort couldn’t wait any longer. It escaped Levi’s lips easily then as the brunette nummed his food. On one hand, it was seemingly… adorable… but what was he thinking? On the other hand, it was highly amusing. Levi decided to stick with that thought over everything else that randomly appeared in his head. Most thoughts couldn’t be the best coming out of… his… brain currently. Besides, since when was Eren adorable? It had to be an effect of the medicine, right? And why did Eren kiss his head? His own thoughts were even confusing right now… With a stubborn huff, the male adverted his eyes to the large spread of food in front of him. Eren must have really been hungry… There was no way Levi could even eat half of this. His stomach still felt funny.  
Regardless, the male picked up his chopsticks clumsily. Usually Kay had plastic forks and spoons… Chopsticks were a fancy delight that he was treated to at Eren’s house as children… Even then, Levi would give up using it right and simply stab it. The memory brought a soft smile sliding up the ravens lips as his shaking, pale fingers curled around the single chopstick, sticking it into one of the sushi items. 

Ashen eyes scanned it then, his mind whirring. Did he really want to try and eat..? Yes… he did. But… would it affect his stomach bad? Tch! He sure as hell hoped not. Without another thought, Levi carefully set the sushi into his mouth.  
Oh.  
That flavor…

It was almost exact to what Eren’s mother served daily… It was good. Forcing his jaw to work, Levi began to chew, eyes half closing to a pleased look. Yes… He was pleased that he attempted to eat. It was good… Really good. Along with that, Eren had that same damn goofy smile on his face that Levi couldn’t help but smile back at him. Things were looking up… Levi had his friend back, and half of his sanity, at least.

(Imaginary Line Break Here.)

“Mm… That was good,” Eren had said after they were both settled down in the chairs, food thrown away and gone. Eren, surprisingly, had ate more than three fourths of the food. Levi had settled happily for a few sushi items and other various side that Eren had piled on the trays. It was a wonder that Eren was that skinny, yet ate like a freaking moose. 

The wonders of metabolism. 

Levi nodded to his friend, leaning back into the wheelchair hesitantly. Hopefully it was clean… His hands were itching for hand sanitizer… And his body, a shower. Hospitals were filled with sickness, and Levi sure as hell didn’t want Eren, or himself sick, frankly. 

It wouldn’t be fun. 

Pushing the thought away, Levi sipped quietly at his water before turning back to his friend. “Eren, why did you come back for me?” The words left before he could stop them, face blank, mind whirring with worry. “Why didn’t you let me die?” Levi finished softly, silver eyes shining with confusion. 

Eren had frowned then, teal eyes focused on the ravenette. “You’re my friend. Even if I was an ass in the past, you weren’t. It was my fault, you shouldn’t have been treated that way. I’ll kill Jean and his fucking group, I swear.” The male began, eyes growing sharper and fiercer by the second. 

“Thank you.” Levi said, wrinkling his nose up in distaste at all the rambling and vicious cursing spewing from Eren’s lips. “Oi… Potty mouth, the old people are staring.” Levi deadpanned once he noticed the looks. 

The parents staring in horror, the older people with wide eyes and a look of disgust grown on their lips, and finally, the children, filled with fear in their tiny eyes. If it wasn’t from thirty million, or so it seemed, nurses staring, Levi would have been greatly amused. But now… Not so much. No one seemed amused. In fact, one old lady looked like she could maul Eren. The very thought brought a snort from Levi’s lips as he once again leaned into his chair, mentally praying it was clean. 

Eren’s mouth immediately closed once the older male spoke, going so far to even pout. “Sorry, Levi.” He mumbled, running a hand through his thick, brown hair. 

Levi laughed, something rare to hear at the moment, lips curling into a grin that made Eren’s heart flutter in joy. “Whatever, brat. You sure you didn’t want to piss the old people off on purpose? I mean, it is fun.” The male teased, eyes slowly regaining their normal mischievous glint. 

Eren laughed too, shaking his head. “Later, Levi. We can blare some music.” He teased, grinning back at his best friend. And lord… Levi’s smile… Eren was so glad to be able to witness that. His heart fluttered once more as he stood, picking up the food trays. “I’m gonna throw this away, then I’ll take you somewhere before the nurse kidnaps you. I’ve been lonely without you, Levi-Kun,” Eren says, and every word was ever so true. Sadly enough, Eren blushed in happiness, eyes closing from the pleased feeling tingling down his spine in a radiant shimmer. It was amazing, in short. With that shimmer still floating through him, Eren practically floated to throw away the trash. 

 

Cheeks shimmering pink, Levi scowled. Why did Eren have to do that so unexpectedly?! Tch! He said this cute stuff suddenly, taking him right off guard. But, why the hell was Levi embarrassed? They were friends.  
Yeah.  
Friends.  
Taking a deep breath, Levi bit the inside of his cheek, ashen eyes focused on the granite table in front of him. Simple things like this… Even this brought back memories… He was honestly surprised to still remember all this, even after he was an idiot and fucked up his body. But still, Levi smiled at the memory, relaxing into the chair as the feeling washed over him, images tingling in his brain. Eren was a brat as a kid… and still was. Grinning like a fool, Levi stared into space, joyful.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashbacks of the two boys. Levi remembers the past, and it was both good and bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, life sucks. Long story short, I have lots of shit going on, and updates will be slow. I'm so sorry. 
> 
> I'll try my best to update fast. 
> 
> Also, I'm sorry Levi. I hope you're doing well. I'll work fast to get this done in time for your birthday!

“Pst! Levi! Look!” Eren yell-whispered, small finger stretching out to point at his mother, whom was setting fresh muffins on the window sill to cool.

Levi and Eren, both around eight gasped and grinned at the delicious looking deserts from behind the pile of bricks, mud, and spare wood they used to craft a very small hide out. At the time, they thought it was the sneakiest thing in the world. Now, they both knew it only made it more obvious, and they should have hid in the bushes.

“Let’s commence the Muffin-Misiion-101, Eren-Chan!” Levi said eagerly, pursing his lips on his child-like-chubby face to try and look stern at that time, earning a giggle and a salute from his childhood friend.

“Aye, Aye!” Eren giggled, getting down on his hands and knees. Carefully, the boy crawled into the plush grass of the backyard, wide teal eyes locked on the muffins, a smile wide on his lips.

Levi had followed, biting his lip as he sneaked behind Eren, more silent than the boy in front of him. Even at this age, sneaking wasn’t a hard thing to do. It seemed like a usual thing already, the sneaking, stealing, and staying hidden. Biting his lip even harder, the raven continued to crawl after his friend, ashen eyes delicately narrowing in a look of focus, locked on the muffins Eren wanted to snatch from his mother.

Eren once more bit his lip, crawling up to the familiar brick wall once more, placing a tiny hand on the brick. Young and cheerful eyes scanned over the delicious chocolate muffins, tongue snaking out to lick his lips softly, mouth watering from the look of the muffins. ~~  
~~

Carefully, Levi turned to his friend, staring, his own ashen eyes shining brightly with energy and joy. The young boy stared at Eren as his small hand reached out, his own heart racing with excitement. It was such an exhilarating moment, even though it was something as simple as stealing muffins.

Eren gulped, nervousness snaking down his spine, leaving a rush of adrenaline to follow that. Pushing away the hesitant feeling his six year old self felt, the boy reached up with a slender hand, fingers curling gently over the tray of the pan. That was, until, he noticed it felt like his fingers were burning. Pain shot through his young body, resulting in a scream to break free from his lips. Mostly from surprise, Eren convinced himself. Not pain, he was too strong for that! Hah! Regardless, the pan shook and trembled, until it tumbled into the grass, the chocolate, fluffy muffins following, toppling into the dirt.

Eren, in tears from the burns, only let the tears stream down his face as his emerald eyes landed on the newfound mess in the grass. The mission failed… With that thought, more tears sprung into the young boy’s eyes, along with a quiet whimper of pain.

Levi had stared with wide eyes the whole time, hand stuck out in the air. He was going to grab the tray, before Eren was ambitious and took the burning hot tray into his hands… Levi had felt burns… They had hurt, but now his fingers were used to it. Now Eren was hurt… Levi carefully crawled closer to his friend, gently taking Eren’s wrist, glancing up into Eren’s teary eyes as the brunette stared and sniffled. The world was quiet for a moment, only the soft rustling of the trees were heard as Levi smiled at his friend, placing his cold fingers gently over the burns on Eren’s fingertips.

“It’s okay now.” Levi said quietly, as he normally was at this age, unless he was playing with Eren, or arguing with Horse Face, as the older kids called Jean. Kenny had a funny name like that for him too. Levi was proud at that age; he had a second name too, just like Jean.

Eren sniffled again, letting the cold sink into his burned finger tips, lifting his other hand into a ball to scrub away his tears harshly, leaving red marks under his eyes. As soon as the boy was to thank Levi, the house door slammed open, the wood sharp against the house as Carla Jaeger stared out with horrified eyes, filled with concern. “Eren?! Levi?! What was that noise—are you two okay?!” The mother asked, frantic and tone high from worry.

 

Eren sniffled again, glancing up at his mother, before he buried his face into the neck of his friend, Levi. Because Levi wouldn’t mind, he was nice, unlike the other kids. And with that motion, the boy began to wail. Not from pain, but from the guilt of trying to steal something of his mothers. And Levi was confused, but explained in a hushed tone, holding his friend gently to him, only able to think about how innocent Eren was, younger than him, still not exposed to the world. If only Levi had known how worse the world was to become.

 

* * *

 

The next two hours passed quickly, Levi quiet, smiling at his talkative friend as he blabbed about surviving a burn as his mother wrapped his fingers, and pinched Eren’s ear, repeating for the millionth time, ‘Behave, Eren. You could have just asked for a muffin.’ With those words, Carla Jaeger turned her kind eyes towards the kitchen, before she repeated her earlier process with a lost sigh weaving from her pink lips.

The Jaeger house was simple, yet looked very wealthy compared to all the places Levi had ‘lived.’   It looked like the home of a nice, kind family. That was true. Eren and Mikasa had a wonderful mother, with a very nice job, and the family received occasional ‘apology’ money from Girsha Jaeger, whom had fled his son and wives life. Income flowed at a steady pace, and Mikasa and Eren reflected that. Nice clothes, always freshly sewed, no stains, no rips, no bagginess or tightness… It all was perfect. Mikasa had a nice decorated bedroom for her eight year old self, and six year old Eren also had a very nice bedroom. It was a mess, but was seeing the floor truly needed? Eren didn’t think so, anyways.

 

Levi sighed at his friend, his simple smile quirking a tiny bit upwards. “Eren, you’re weird.” The boy commented, making Eren giggle and shift on his spot on the plush couch. Levi had long forgotten what the main topic of Eren talking for hours was, but the most recent topic revolved around things you could imagine a six year old boy talking about. Levi was right, Eren was weird. Yet the ravenette adored his friend.

“So are you!” Eren said suddenly, pushing Levi down on the couch, the two boys erupting into laughter as Levi reversed the role, tackling Eren this time. Both wore wide grins, eyes shining in a way that was rare to see on the older boy. Eren was grateful to see his friend this way. At times, Eren would ask where Levi’s father was, if his father was like his own, and Levi would sometimes not speak for hours, or on worst case scenario, scream and hold his head. Those were the worst days, when Eren felt helpless, and also screamed, getting Carla’s attention, whom would call Kay, and Kay would carefully explain the situation, before quickly driving over. Those were always the worst days.

The wrestling continued for what seemed like hours, until Eren, exhausted, collapsed on his friend, both panting and tired, Levi’s hair messily and choppy on his face. In that time, Levi stared wearily at his friend. Eren’s clothes were nice once more… Levi then looked at his own black shirt, the bottoms filled with holes, and his cut and homemade, worn, fabricated jeans. The two utterly tired, not even Carla knew when they had fell asleep, Eren craned on Levi in a strange position, Levi simply looking like he was trying to curl into a ball, (Which he was.) awkwardly positioned under the brunette.

Those were the good days.

* * *

 

 

The two had many more good days as well. One particularly great day fell four years later, in the summer of Eren being ten, and Levi twelve. It was dead in the summer, making the weather in Wyoming particularly humid, making the beach a very desirable place. This was a good year, though it was also the last year before the two would enter Middle School, and little did they know; they would also be torn apart, leaving Levi to be buried in the dust. Looking back on it now, that’s what made that last year of their youth so precious.

 

“Leviiiii!” Came the wail from outside of the main door, the sound of knocking frantically following it. Eren had wanted to go to the beach, and Mikasa had been dragged along. The last key to going was Levi. Eren had declared, and quite loudly at that, if Levi wasn’t going, that they were going home. Thus, Eren ended up on his doorstep, pouting with shimmering eyes as he relentlessly knocked.

Levi blinked once from the eruption of noise at his door, silver eyes drifting from their place on his novel, eyes heading towards the scratched and beaten down door. His entire house was mostly beaten down, due to the money problem… Levi pushed the thought away,, gently folding a page of the novel, before setting it on the table. He already knew who it was, that frantic knocking was enough to hint him, and the voice was the last puzzle piece to certainty. Levi stood then, stretching delicately, back cracking in a way that made himself cringe. Perhaps he shouldn’t curl into a ball that much… Shrugging, Levi shuffled tiredly towards the army of noise that was hidden behind the door, slender fingers wrapping around the door handle. With a single twist, Levi became face to face with his friend, ashen eyes glimmering.

“You take forever!” The ten year old wailed dramatically, shifting the beach bag over his arm once more. That’s when Levi got the hint. Oh. The sunlight, water, hot air… and abandon his book and cool fan…

Levi sighed, dipping his head, shaking it. Eren was a brat, nothing could change that. “Whatever, brat. I’ll go get my swim trunks.” The male said in defeat. Eren wouldn’t give up. It wasn’t like he had a choice anyways, right?

Mikasa shook her head, stepping next to Eren, from her place behind her younger brother. “Carla bought some for you. She said it was better than your rags,” Mikasa said quite bluntly, tugging at the strings on her swimsuit top, dark hair fluttering over her face. She earned a hiss and a light push from her younger brother from that.

“Mikasa! You weren’t supposed to say that!” Eren said frantically, glancing to see, surprisingly, Levi’s also surprised face. “Mom bought them because she saw your other ones were getting old,” Eren attempted to explain, voice frantic. “Not that they’re rags or anything.” He finished, holding out one of the plastic bags to his friend.

Levi once again fell silent for a moment, staring at the two, then the bag. Why was Carla so nice to him..? That’s what he didn’t understand. Carla treated him like her own… Why? Biting his lip, Levi murmured quietly, “Thank you, brat.” Unconsciously, his lips quirked into a smile as he took the bag, cold fingers brushing against warm ones. The smile he received was enough to make his day, though he wouldn’t ever admit that.

 

After enough of Eren now pounding at Levi’s bedroom door, Levi grumbling and shouting he would be out soon, Levi finally emerged from the bedroom, pale arms crossed over his scarred body, the black swim trunks hanging loosely on his hips. Levi was very frail at twelve, ribcage just able to be traced in his skin, everything on him deathly pale. Sunlight and socializing at that age seemed like hell, not that it wasn’t still, but he could endure it better at seventeen. Sure, Kay made him go outside, but he would sit in the shade of the tree, or jog in the alleyways, only pleading innocent for one reason: He didn’t want to get sunburn on his scars. It seemed reasonable, so the twelve year old boy simply blabbed that answer to Kay every day.

A sigh parting from the raven’s pale lips, Levi stepped into the hallway, and into the living room, bare feet making soft sounds of the wood floor. Eren was staring, Mikasa was staring at the ground. The two different atmospheres to his scars only made Levi shiver, not from the cold, and put his arms farther over his chest to cover the awful wounds and memories that followed them. “Come on, brat. You said you were in a hurry. What happened to that peppiness now?” Levi grunted, a bit rougher than planned. Regardless, it got Eren to scramble out the door, followed by Mikasa, then Levi. He didn’t mean to snap at his best friend, but it just came out. Levi didn’t exactly appreciate being stared at. At all.

 Eren was silent as they walked, and Mikasa, to no surprise was deathly silent, tugging on her hair silently. For Eren to be silent however, that was a major change. Levi couldn’t help but be relieved when they rounded the corner into the ‘good’ side of town, when Eren’s mouth opened.

“Aren’t your feet burning from the hot pavement?” The brunette asked, pointing at Levi’s bare feet, whom also looked at his own feet, simply shrugging.

Did he feel pain? No, it was nothing more than taking a warm shower, or a warm bath. Licking his dry lips now, Levi adverted his steel colored eyes to Eren, who was staring directly at the ravenette now. “Really? You’re weird, Levi.” Eren said, lips curled into a teasing smile.

Smiling softly at the ground, the shorter male suddenly wrapped his arms around Eren’s waist, slinging the younger one over his shoulder, grinning and laughing aloud now. This was common for Levi, to pick and tease Eren. Levi carefully held his friend over his shoulder, grinning at the fact the younger male was squealing and clinging to his legs.

“Levi! Put me down!” Eren wailed dramatically, arms clenched around Levi’s thighs to try and hold on tighter, even though his mind was screaming partly that Levi had him, he was okay, he could let go. However, the other part of him screamed to be let go.

“You trust me, don’t you?” Levi asked seriously, frowning at the shiver that went down his spine. But, why? It was from Eren touching his thighs, but why was he shivering from that? It wasn’t a bad shiver either… It felt… Right… Good… Why? Shivering lightly aloud this time, Mikasa faced Levi with a deadpanned look. Unlike Levi, she was informed of such… things.

Eren bit his lip, still clinging to Levi’s thighs. Did he trust Levi? Yes, he did. “Yes.” Eren answered softly, loosening his grip on Levi’s thighs, though still not completely letting go. He trusted the elder male, but regardless, he needed to hold on to something.

“Good.” Levi answered, holding tightly onto Eren’s waist and legs still, cold fingers brushing over Eren’s exposed skin, making them both shiver, the reason unknown to them, while Mikasa hissed. That reason was also unknown, but hearing Mikasa hiss at Levi, the raven grinned.

 

* * *

 

The walk took a good thirty minutes, of which Levi carried Eren over his shoulder with ease, sometimes even jogging ahead of Mikasa, which she would try to catch up, (and fail miserably,) and Levi would smile. Eren was content, half way through the walk he went so far to let go and trust Levi completely. Once the jogging started, however, Eren once again clung to Levi’s thighs, another delicious shiver spiking up Levi’s spine, making his lips twist. He had decided to ask Kay at that point when he arrived home, (Which ended at home with Levi blushing, and Kay holding her ears.) Luckily enough, the beach came into view.

The sand was a soft golden color, spread vastly through the area, with waves of crisp blue water from the lake rippling and rolling into the sand. The blue sky was cloudless, the sun a brilliant shining yellow color in the sky, making the water gleam brightly against the radiant sand. The entire area looked as if it was on a movie, or painted by an extremely talented artist. It was enough to make Levi pause in his steps, Eren to stare with shimmering eyes, and Mikasa to drop her hand from her hair. All eyes were hooked on different areas of the beautiful beach.

Levi stared at the ripples and white caps of the water, the look of them absolutely brilliant to him. The soft white contrasting with the blue ripples against the flowing color of the grains of the sand. Levi had never seen anything so beautiful. The alleyways… His backyard… The tree in his yard… None compared.

Mikasa had her attention to the children in an area of the sand, whom all were laughing and playing in their youth, with a mother smiling fondly at them. That was the sight she most enjoyed. She wanted to become a mother herself one day. The thing that struck her most however was not that, but instead memories of her own mother staring with that loving look at her. Mikasa clutched her necklace, the soft blue color one that contrasted her eyes brilliantly, as her mother had said when she gave it over.

Eren had teal eyes adverted to the sky. Many days were cloudy, and/or rainy in Wyoming. Today, the sky itself was the pure color of blue Eren always desired to see. The color of his father’s eyes, and… The hint in Levi’s when he was doing something he loved. Levi would read to him somedays, and that’s where he saw that beautiful spark. The spark that lied deep within Levi’s usually cold eyes. The shine that Eren was proud until this day to see, however rare it may be. That color was beautiful, and every chance he could see it, Eren would greedily accept. Eren admired Levi. He truly did look up to Levi. He respected the elder male, and frequently looked up to him for advice. It was normal for Eren, yet he normally hid that feeling from Levi. He was embarrassed to admit that, not like it wasn’t normal. Feelings didn’t usually come easily to Eren, and he was sure it was the same for Levi. Not that he would ever try to say that to Levi, anyways. That may end horribly for the brunette, and he was not willing to risk it at the moment.

 

* * *

 

Minutes passed until Levi was able to advert his eyes from the shimmering water, turning his attention to Eren, swinging the boy into his arms bridal style first. He made a promise not to drop him, after all. Levi intended to keep that promise. He was lucky enough to be trusted by Eren, and he didn’t dare break that trust. Levi stared down at the younger of the friends, face emotionless except for the soft twinkle in his eyes. “See? I didn’t drop you.” Levi stated matter of a factly, shifting his arms to gently put the boy down, which also made Levi scowl. Eren was officially taller than him… Tch! Scoffing, Levi looked away from Eren’s face, whom was wearing wide eyes and pink cheeks. That strange stirring feeling happened again, making Levi grunt and cross his arms over his chest. Why was this happening..?

Eren had stared, simply wide eyes through the whole thing. Closeness between the two best friends was normal, so why did Levi look so… weird? Eren was confused, but also giddy. That was, when Levi mentioned his height that he was giddy. Eren laughed aloud now, grinning playfully down at Levi. “So, shorty?” Eren teased.

Levi’s eye twitched, and almost instantly, Levi swung Eren into his arms bridal style again. He was going to throw him into the lake for that. Eren had yelped and started to protest quite loudly when Levi had begun to walk quickly, deeper and closer to the rippling waves of the water. Short, huh?

Eren squealed once more, desperately tugging on Levi’s hair, which sadly, didn’t work. Levi seemed blank, dark eyes focused forward directly towards the water. Eren whined as the sound of the waves crashing against rocks grew stronger in his ears. Then, the world was still. Eren was… floating..? No. He was falling. A screech left his lips as he tried to yell Levi’s name, before Eren crashed into the cold ripples. Breathless. Eren’s breath was gone, trapped in his lungs. Teal eyes went wide and wild as bubbles escaped from his lips and nose, arms flailing in the cold water. No air came yet, Eren had been thrown too deep. Right? Almost a miracle, Eren’s feet brushed against the sandy bottom of the lake, and his head, now soaking wet, emerged from the waves.

Eren gasped, panted, and glared at the practically hysterical, (With laughter,) Levi. Spitting out a gulp of water, Eren shivered in the cool water, slowly letting himself adapt to it. The water felt great now… The sun and water… A perfect mixture. Taking a deep breath, Eren sunk under the water again, diving towards the bottom.

The sight was priceless. Glancing up, Eren saw the sun shining radiantly through the bubbles of the water and the smooth ripples, making Eren grin, a single bubble weaving its way from the brunette’s lips. Swimming deeper into the enveloping feeling of the water, teal eyes skimmed over the array of colors and shapes beneath him. The rocks intrigued him, as much as it wasn’t exactly ‘normal.’ Eren stretched a tan arm out, letting his fingers curl around the rock he had first caught a glimpse of. The silver of the rock shined, and there were small hints of blue in it. It reminded him of Levi’s eyes…

His lungs cried out in need for air as soon as he gripped the rock, and Eren shot up above the water, panting and gasping for the sweet feeling of air to flood his lungs once more. Glancing forward, Eren stared at Levi, whom was… Directly in front of him. Eren screamed, flailing his arms in surprise. In short, Eren was frightened easily. Levi knew that.

Levi once again erupted into laughter, sadistic glint shining brightly in his eyes as the boy observed the other, and finally the rock in his hand. The raven quirked an eyebrow at Eren. The rock was so plain… silver… Why would Eren pick that one? “That rocks boring. Why did you get it?” He asked bluntly.

Eren, finally getting his breath back shot a glare at Levi, before his lips curled into a soft, surprisingly shy smile. “It’s not boring. It reminded me of something very… important.” Eren said, holding the rock out towards Levi. “It’s for you. The rock is like your eyes. A shiny silver, with a hint of blue. It’s beautiful.” Eren explained, shoving the rock into Levi’s hands, before he dipped under the water again.

Levi stared. He was motionless, wide eyes turned towards the rock that was placed in his hands. Important..? Beautiful..? Did Eren think that of his eyes? Levi clutched the rock tightly, biting his lip. Eren was kind… Then and there, Levi made a mental promise. He would never abandon this boy. Eren was too kind for him… Taking a deep breath, Levi sank under the water, becoming face to face with his friend, as this time he grinned, the rock still clutched between his pale fingers. This was one of the good days.  


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi snaps out of his daydream, only to be surprised that it was a deadly black out. The sun shines bright as Kay arrives, and the three are finally bale to laugh together. But, will that ray of sun last..?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... This started off as a really happy chapter, and then something happened. Note: Don't put your music on shuffle while writing. It turned into depressing music, and next thing you know, my typing got faster and darker... Fast. I'm sorry in advance. IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE THIS DEPRESSING, I SWEAR. 
> 
> Also, I'm sorry for the long delay on this chapter. I was lacking motivation for a while, until some good things happened. (Which somehow made me write a depressing chapter? Logic? I don't know what logic is anymore.) So, I hope the length of this chapter makes up for it. 
> 
> Levi, happy (early) birthday again. c: 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own AoT or any of the characters, only my OC's. 
> 
> WARNING: There's a lot of mention of rape at the end, though it's not graphic. So, maybe a trigger warning?

“Levi? Levi? Are you okay?!”

Levi blinked once, then twice, staring blearily up at the shouting faces. How..? Why were there so many people staring at him..? Eren… Why was Eren shouting at him..? He was just daydreaming for a while… Did he not hear Eren? Levi blinked once more, clearing the haziness from his eyes as they focused completely on Eren, observing the brunette. It was obvious that Eren was freaking out. His eyes shined brightly, and Eren almost looked like he was going to cry. “What the hell are you freaking out about..? I was enjoying that daydream, you know…” Levi said, voice huskier than what he imagined. How long was he out? Now that he thought about it… He wasn’t in the café anymore… He was back in his room… And the nurse was there… Levi frowned then, staring at Eren once more. He was confused, to say the least.

This time, there were tears forming in the corner of shining orbs. Eren hiccupped, running a hand through his hazelnut hair. He was so scared… Levi blacked out… Yet he thought he was daydreaming… ‘My Fault…’ Eren thought, before letting a sob wrench from his lips, gently leaning over to push his face into the crook of Levi’s neck. So what if Levi was uncomfortable with this? Right now, Eren frankly didn’t give a shit. He was just so frightened to see Levi this way… The male squeezed his eyes tightly shut, fist curling into a ball at his side. Levi… Levi… Please get better. “Don’t do it again, please!” Eren said, half of his words more of a sob than anything.

Levi blinked once again. He didn’t understand at all. Did he pass out or something..? Was that not just a daydream..? Oh. That would explain the nurses, and the tears… Levi gently moved one arm. He could move fine… So why was everyone having a fit from him passing out? That was the part Levi mostly didn’t understand. Regardless, the male gently pulled Eren into him, seeing as Eren had his neck twisted funny before. It didn’t look comfortable. So instead of letting a friend stay in that position, Levi tugged the taller male into the bed with him, slender arm wrapping around Eren’s shoulders. “I’m sorry.” Levi said, voice hushed against Eren’s hair. Seeing Eren this upset… It cracked something inside of him. Levi buried his face deep into Eren’s hair, sighing deeply. He had made a mistake, and the feeling of that regret bubbled inside of him fully now, enveloping his heart, making him shiver and his hands tremble. Why did he ever give up? It was a good idea then, but now it just hurt worse… Why was life that cruel? No. Life gave him his Eren back. That’s more than he could ever ask.

Eren sniffled softly, burying his face farther into Levi’s shoulder. “You just scared me…” Eren admitted quietly, a deep sigh leaving his throat. His heart was still racing… When he came back to Levi, slumped over in the chair… It killed him inside. Eren had screamed bloody murder, frightening most of the cafeteria.

One of the doctors sighed, out of relief. “We’re glad you’re okay, Mr. Ackerman. Eren, we’ll leave him with you. He seems stable. Just be careful with the wires.” The doctor reminded the brunette, a warm smile curling up his lips. The doctor seemed nice, and his eyes were like the sea. “If you need anything, press the button. Ask for Mr. Smith, and I’ll come.” Mr. Smith then said, before motioning to the herd of doctors. The room was small enough as it was, and frankly, everyone was glad to get out of the crowded room, leaving Eren and Levi in silence, only the soft click of the door behind them.

Carefully, Eren sat up, observing his pale friend. Levi looked better than when he first saw him… Perhaps good things would come from this… Eren sure as hell hoped so. Levi’s eyes shone as Levi met his stare, though with a newly confused look. Levi’s lips moved, forming words, but Eren could only stare. The raven hair that dusted delicately on his head and covered some of his eyes… Silver, moonlit eyes that made the room sink into darkness, the eyes being the focus of all… Those high, kingly like cheekbones… This was Levi… His friend… His best friend… This was a dangerous sight for the time. Eren could feel the tears forming again, as he stared into Levi’s widening eyes. His heart still wouldn’t calm down… But this time, it was worse than fear. It was love. That sickening feeling that made Eren’s gut wrench. This was why Eren cared. This is why Eren cried. This is why, Eren broke the most from leaving Levi alone. This is why… Eren was doomed.

Eren smiled at his friend, it being a weak and dull gesture. The male lifted his shaking hands to cup Levi’s cheeks, before letting himself cry, letting it turn harder when Levi held him. Because he was doomed, because his heart hurt, because he hurt Levi, because Eren wouldn’t get this wish, because… _Eren didn’t deserve him._

 

* * *

 

It seemed like hours as the two boys sat there, Eren’s breath still shaky and ragged from all the tears that fell, his back moving abnormally with each large breath. Levi, on the other hand, had simply been thinking the entire time Eren cried, and Levi held him closer and tighter. The poor kid… He really had scared him shitless. The thought would have been funny, though not in this situation.

His mind wandered to Kay for a while. He just hoped she wasn’t too badly freaked out… That thought lingered for a while, with Levi having his eyes closed. It was a moment of silence, horrifying still, until the bed shifted. Levi’s eyes flickered open softly to meet glimmering teal eyes, strangely close to his. That color… Instead of asking the obvious question, Levi instead settled for staring into that soft color in silence.

That twinkle, the one that always danced through Eren’s eyes, the cool blue color of the ocean on a windy day, and the soft green of a meadow all silked through his orbs, with a perfect circle of darkness swirling in the middle. The reflection of his own ashen eyes shone through the dark circle, making Levi bite his lip. Eye contact was always so awkward… For some reason, his heart decided to skip a beat when staring into those beautiful eyes. “Eren?” Levi finally murmured, shaking his hair out of his eyes, only to have that fail miserably, the dark strands landing perfectly across his nose and sunken in cheeks.

“Levi… I have to tell you something,” Eren said quickly, his own eyes wide. What the hell was he doing? He didn’t want to say it, he didn’t want to do it, not now… He just got Levi back, he couldn’t lose him again… What if Levi was disgusted? God. His heart pounded, no, flittered like a damn hyperactive butterfly in his chest. It felt like it was trying to escape his ribcage. Che! “I… Levi…” Eren sputtered, running a hand nervously through his own hair, the other hand still supporting himself to hover over Levi. The confession was bad enough, but his choice of position… Eren flushed pink, gritting his teeth. He was such an idiot… He couldn’t do this!

Levi blinked, staring up at the flustered brunette. “Eren? What? Just tell me, brat.” Levi said bluntly, sitting up slightly, skin brushing against Eren’s. Little did he know, it wasn’t the cold that made both of them shiver. Levi opened his mouth to speak once more, but quickly shut it when Eren also opened his.

“I can’t… Levi, I—“ Eren started, just about to desperately shout out his feelings, when the door flung open, and quite loudly at that. Eren jumped, Levi jumped, and the person at the door went dark red. Of course it looked awkward. Eren hovered over Levi, both of his hands clenched in the bed sheets next to the raven. Eren’s face was a dark red, whilst Levi simply looked content, sat up ever so slightly, both of their chests daring to touch when one of the two took a breath. Levi had bed head, messy hair, and Eren had the similar mess in his locks. No matter how much explaining Eren had to blab, he was in fact happy, no, relieved. He wouldn’t have to confess after all… Thank the Heavens…

 

Kay blinked twice, observing the scene before her. Her face was already growing hot, and sadly, her mouth was dry, only letting out a ‘mph’ sound of surprise. Then, her eyes hit ashen eyes, and Kay’s eyes filled with tears. “Levi… You’re okay…” The older sister breathed, dipping her head in relief, the tears silently dripping down her cheeks. Quickly, Kay threw her bag to the floor, practically leaping across the room to not only hug Levi, but scoop both Eren and Levi into her arms in a tight hug. She would question what the hell they were doing later. For now, just feeling the warmth of Levi’s skin and seeing those usually cold eyes to be thawed was good enough for her.

Levi let out a choked breath of surprise, wrapping his arms back around Kay, crushing Eren non-willingly between them in a tight sandwich of a hug. It was so warm… To have both Kay and Eren there, both safe… Levi could relax into the embrace as Eren wiggled to awkwardly slip an arm around Levi so he wouldn’t collapse beneath the embrace. “Yeah, I’m okay now. I was stupid then…” Levi mumbled, burying his face into Kay’s arm, breathing in her scent. Flowers and butterscotch… Just like he remembered. He must have lost sight of this. How devastated Kay would have been if he actually did go through with it, how devastated Eren would have been… Levi was blind then, and now his eyes were slowly opening. Though it seemed dark in the beginning… There was light. He just had to reach for it, as much as he had to scream and yell for help reaching it. It was able to be done.

Kay sobbed in relief, her messy blonde hair that was strung in a ponytail flopped over Eren as she squeezed Levi tighter. “Good…” She sniffed, squeezing her fists into her younger brothers’ shirt. She really did fuck up… Spending all that time with her boyfriend… She regretted it now. It was a long moment, where Kay lung to her brother, and Eren wheezed for air from the even tighter embrace.

Finally, Levi pushed her gently. “Oi, we’re killing Eren.” Levi said, a gruff chuckle leaving his throat.

Even though Eren could barely breathe, he grinned into Levi’s chest. Levi laughed… Levi laughed… When he giggled, it was muffled by a wheeze for air.

Kay only giggled as she sat up on the end of the bed, wiping her smeared eyeliner from all of the tears. “From seeing… that… from before, I don’t think he minds being that close to you.” Kay teased, pinching Eren’s ear. From being around Carla for a while, the only mother in town that didn’t judge her, Kay had (sadly-To Eren,) picked up that very habit when teasing the brunette.

Eren blushed, quickly sitting up, fumbling to crawl off of Levi’s lap, as clumsy as it was. God, Kay… “I-I don’t mind, but we weren’t doing what you think we were!” Eren declared feverously, rubbing the back of his neck. He couldn’t even look at Levi. Even seeing Levi’s legs made him blush. He was in a very… provocative… position earlier… “It’s not like I was grinding my penis against him, Kay.” Eren said, before blushing deep red at his own words. Mentally, he hit himself.

Levi wasn’t the only one that choked at those words, like brother and sister alike, they both fell into a fit of coughing for at least thirty seconds, where Eren could only helplessly blush. “Eren?! What the hell?! Of course we weren’t doing that! The brat said he had something to tell me, a-and before he was crying and shit, so I was hugging him!” Levi sputtered out loudly, shaking his head at Eren. Where did those words, from a brat like him, even come from?!

Kay, getting over her coughing fit then fell into a deeper blush, violently shaking her head. “Uh huh, whatever you two say. Just use a condom, alright, Levi? And for heaven’s sake, tell me if you’re gay!” 

This time, both Eren and Levi blushed, the two sputtering at the grinning Kay. For once, Levi was scarred. Who knew a girl could go into some much detail, shamelessly, about gay sex? It stunned the two as she babbled, before Levi buried his face into a pillow, and Eren stared at her, blushing deep red, face twisted into a stubborn look. 

 

* * *

 

“So they’re letting you have food already?” Kay asked once more, tossing a chip into her mouth.

Levi nodded, softly sipping his water, tucking his knees tighter to his chest in the chair. “Yeah, I was surprised too. They said the stitches went really well, but I can’t have sharp stuff, you fucking tease.” Levi grunted, flicking her bag of chips.

Eren laughed along with Kay, as Kay triumphantly held up another chip, slowly biting into the crunchy material. “Patience, young grasshopper.”

“Eren, I’m moving in with you.” Levi declared, as the two once again burst into laughter. A smile slid up Levi’s lips as he took another drink.

Kay had decided to rent a hotel room right next to the hospital, and promised to stay as late as she could. Being family, she could stay as long as she wanted too. Oblivious, Levi still didn’t understand how Eren was able to stay the night over at the hospital. He wasn’t family… Did he lie? Once Levi pondered that, he had smiled. Eren lied, just to stay with him. He was an amazing friend. Friend, the very sound of that word sounded weird on his tongue again, and even in his mind. It did suit Eren, a friend. But why did Levi feel like the word didn’t fit anymore? Best friend?  Close friend? Did he deserve a higher title? But, what title? Not having much time to ponder it, Levi decided to push the thought away for later times. Soon after that, they ended up this way. Kay and Eren relaxed in chairs, Levi reluctantly following them. Kay had decided to call the nurses with the large red button, which clearly meant not to touch it, making Levi sigh as she was her weird self, demanding that Levi wanted chips. When in fact, he didn’t, not to mention, he couldn’t have them. When the nurse told her that, Kay had confessed she wanted them. With a laugh, the nurse had fetched them, and Eren voiced that he could use a water, only to end up with Levi snatching it. All three had laughed then. It was a relaxing moment for the three, all of them being able to be themselves, knowing everything was right with each other, and things were well at the moment. It was a breath of fresh air that all accepted greedily.

 

* * *

 

In the midst of their chatting, a knock came at the door, making Levi look up as the nurse from before entered the room. Frankly, he couldn’t remember her name. “You’re looking better, Levi! That’s good! You remember me, right?” The nurse asked, stepping up to the male.

Levi nodded once, and Eren smiled at the nurse. Levi knew the face, just not the name.

The nurse had smiled back. “Good. The doctor wants to see you, to do an evaluation on your mental health. Would you like your sister or boyfriend to accompany you?” The nurse asked, pen poised at her paper.

Levi did the unthinkable, spitting out his water, erupting into a cough. Kay stared at Eren, and Eren went dark red, silently waving his hand in a desperate way at Kay, hoping she would understand.

Boyfriend? KIs that how he lied, and was able to stay here? That brat… How embarrassing… For once, Levi’s cheeks tinted pink, as he wiped his mouth from spitting out the water.

Luckily, Kay got the hint. “Sorry, Ma’am! They’re close, but my brother always gets embarrassed over stuff like that. Heh!” Kay said, smiling sheepishly at the nurse. Eren let out a breath of relief.

Levi’s brain was slowly starting to click back in place. He wanted Eren to stay… He didn’t want him to go… He had to play along. “Sorry. Kay’s right…” Levi said, rubbing the back of his neck, pursing his lips. Did he want Eren or Kay to come along to the evaluation? Both might feel guilty from hearing him talk… But, would he have to go into detail? Or, should he just go in alone? “Can both of them come?” Levi asked finally, twisting his finger around in his tee shirt. (Side Note: The doctors let him get out of the scrubs.)

The nurse smiled and nodded, scribbling it down. “Of course. Ms. Ackerman, Eren Jaeger, I need you two to fill out these forms. It’s basically saying that if you sign, you agree to support Levi in there, and not discuss what anyone says in there to anyone besides yourselves.” The nurse explained, handing Kay the form first. “Mr. Ackerman, you also need to sign, saying that you agree willingly to have both in there with you, and you aren’t being forced against your will.” She said, a small laugh leaving her lips. “It’s something I must do, I’m sorry if it’s strange.”

Levi nodded, lips quirking with amusement. “I understand.” He said, waiting as Kay signed, then Eren. Finally, Levi took the form, also scribbling down his name in neat cursive. When he was done, Levi held it back for the nurse to take.

The nurse nodded, smiling brightly at them all. “Good. Mr. Ackerman, the doctor requested you stayed in the wheelchair for at least two more days before trying to walk. If needed, we’ll provide psychical therapy. Would you like me to push him?” The nurse then asked Kay and Eren.

Almost immediately, Eren shook his head. “I’ve got it. He’s easy to pick up anyways.” Eren said, grinning teasingly at the shorter male, only to receive a playful scowl and grumble. Proving his point, Eren gently scooped the darker haired male into his arms, before lowering him into the wheelchair. “There you are, your highness.”

That one earned him a scowl, and a ram from the wheelchair. Luckily, everyone did laugh at that, even Levi.

 

* * *

 

 

Eren was highly amused with making screeching sounds as he pushed Levi around corners. Before, Eren had been tense as he pushed Levi, but now, he was having a blast. Finally, they rounded one more corner with a screech from Eren laughing from Kay, and a smile from the nurse, with Levi snickering quietly. At least the brat was having fun.

The nurse stopped to motion to a brown door, the title, ‘Mr. Bane.’

“Here he is!” The nurse said, knocking lightly on the door. “Mr. Bane! Levi is here.” She said, just as the door was opened, revealing a Portuguese man, with curly black hair to his shoulders, and a kind smile.

“Mr. Ackerman! Come in. You two must be Kay, and Eren. Take a seat. I’m Alexandru, no need to worry about formalities with me.” Alexandru said happily, walking back to his desk, allowing Eren to push Levi’s chair in, before taking a seat in one chair, Kay in the other.

Levi nodded at the doctor. “Thanks.” He murmured quietly, ashen eyes scanning the room. It was nicely cleaned and arranged… A single picture was on the wall. It looked like a drawing, perhaps from a kid, maybe his child. Though, he didn’t look very old. Early thirties, if that.

Kay and Eren also said their thank you’s with a smile, but now Levi was too focused on one fact. He was wearing gloves… Why did he need those? Black leather gloves… Levi pursed his lips.

Noticing his staring, Alexandru smiled. “I’m surprised you didn’t already ask. I burnt them in a fire, and it scares people.” The doctor admitted, sitting down in his chair, just as the nurse shut the door, leaving the four in the room.

Levi frowned. “’M sorry.” He said, shifting in the wheelchair. A fire… Even though his curiosity grew, Levi didn’t dare ask how it happened.

“It’s quite alright! Now, let’s start, shall we? Just answer the questions as honestly as possible, please. If any time you need to stop, let me know. This process, considering your background… May be rough. I only ask that that you don’t attempt to throw a plant at me.” Alexandru said. Though it seemed to be a joke, he wasn’t smiling anymore. “Full name and age, please.”

Levi blinked, leaning back in his chair. The process may be hard because of his background? What the hell did that mean? “Levi Magnus Ackerman, seventeen.”

“What school do you go to?”

Levi paused, thinking for a moment, before he turned to Eren, unable to answer.

“Brookdale High, sir.” Eren answered for him, as Levi murmured his thanks.

“Thank you, Eren. What’s your relation to Eren again?”

Immediately, Levi ran along with the lie once more. “Boyfriend. He was my friend since kindergarten, but we kept growing closer and closer.” At least that part wasn’t a lie.

“Mmmm. Levi, Kay looks young to be your mother. Please, explain.”

“She’s my sister. My mom’s dead.” Levi said hesitantly, shoulders softly tensing. “If she didn’t adopt me, I would have been taken to the orphanage. She didn’t want that, and neither did I.” Levi murmured, once again fiddling with his sleeves, then his fingers.

“What about your father?”

The room fell silent, and Levi’s fingers curled into soft balls. Kay also tensed, and Eren bowed his head. “He’s an insane bastard who isn’t allowed to see me anymore.”

“Levi, what did he do to you?”

Levi was silent for a moment, ashen eyes widening.

“Sir—Please, don’t ask him this—“ Eren stuttered out, only to be interrupted.

“I have to know, Jaeger. Please let him answer.” Alexandru said plainly, leaning forward to stare at the boy.

The voices in his head whispered, some giggled. They all sounded like Kenny, Kenny, and Kenny… That wretched man, that horrible feeling. Levi felt sick. The memories slammed into his brain once more, making his fists tighten harder.

“He beat me.” Levi said. It wasn’t a lie, but at least it forced the memories away.

“And, Levi? We saw something else on your file, but I want to confirm it.”

Levi stiffened more, fists trembling. No, please god, not this again… He didn’t want to remember. He didn’t want to hear those sounds again. He didn’t want to feel that sickening feeling again… He didn’t want to remember the pain, the laughter, and Kenny’s sickness. The sickening feeling of the filth. The sounds of Kenny’s sick pleasure…

“Stop,” Levi whispered, cradling his head in his hands. “You know damn well what he did! Don’t make me say it!” Levi said sharply, eyes widening more.

Eren hesitated, looking at the doctor. “Sir! Stop! Don’t make him remember this!” Eren said, now gritting his teeth. That sick bastard, was he torturing Levi?! What was the point in this?! “You’re supposed to help me, dammit! Not make him worse!” Eren now yelled, standing up.

Alexandru ignored Eren, turning back to Levi. “Say it, Levi. Did he rape you? Did it hurt? What did he do to you?”

Levi held his head, wide eyes turning even wilder. “Stop!” He screamed, squeezing his head tighter. That was the last thing he remembered, before Levi couldn’t help but scream, and hold his head. The memories… He didn’t want to see it… He didn’t want to hear Kenny’s sick moans, the sticky sound, and his own cries of pain… He didn’t want to see Kenny’s sick smile, and the filth sliding into him, and the blood spreading everywhere.

* * *

 

**_‘But don’t you like it, baby boy?’_** The voice crooned inside his head.

* * *

 

Levi screamed again, before he felt the warmth of something cover him.

‘You’re safe, Levi!’ A voice said, somewhere in the distance. It was too far away… He couldn’t crawl out of this hole, not now… His sight was turning blurry. Once again, he squeezed his eyes shut, but that proved to be worse.

 

Eren gritted his teeth at the screaming, clenching his fists harder at his sides. “You fucking bastard! You knew this would happen!” Eren yelled angrily, teal eyes shining with deep anger. Did the doctor do this on purpose?! Eren wanted to punch the doctor, so fucking bad. But, that would only get him in trouble… That wouldn’t help Levi. So instead, Eren hissed at the doctor, almost like a rabid animal, before rushing over to his screaming friend, picking him up in his arms, holding his squirming body against him tightly. “Go fuck yourself.” Eren hissed at the doctor, before he glanced at Kay, whom was wearing a disgusted and horrified look as instead, she did exactly what Eren wanted to do. Kay picked up the doctors coffee, sending it against his white shirt.

“You’re sick. Making him turn hysterical. Eren’s right, go fuck yourself.” Kay growled, blue eyes almost daggers into the doctors, who strangely was still calm, only sighing.

 

* * *

 

_‘Look at me, boy. Look at me when I’m doing something for you. I’m making you feel good, boy! Be fucking happy!’ Kenny screamed between thrusts, slapping the shaking boy harder against his face._

 

* * *

 

The scene, that damned scene… It kept replaying in his head, like a broken VHS Tape… Glitching, so each time it felt more and more realistic, until he could feel the burn again, the pain throbbing through everywhere, and those burning cruel eyes. What scared him the most was that… _Levi had Kenny’s filthy eyes._  

 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi gets released from the hospital months later, where Eren and Levi can finally relax. But, can it be relaxing for long?

The hissing of static was getting louder, and louder… Everything felt weightless. It was a plain, grey substance that washed around his skin, tingling gently on the hairs. He was weightless, not only was the substance, he was too. His eyes were closed, even though he wanted to open them. How did he wake up..? Where was everyone..? It wasn’t quiet anymore, though the cold only grew worse with each fabrication of static that drifted amongst the substance and his ears. It swirled, curled, and caressed the substance. Everything was vibrating now, leaving his body to shiver in the quake of the substance. Something snapped, and now Levi was falling. Drifting into the dark, far down into the black of night.

 

* * *

 

“Levi?” Eren murmured, brown eyebrows gently furrowed together in concentration. Carefully, the boy reached out a hand to poke Levi’s cheek. Once again, Levi furrowed his eyebrows and squeezed his eyes tighter shut. The brunette sighed, gently pushing a strand of raven hair from his friends face. In the midst of his screaming, Levi had gone dead silent. That damned doctor… Eren clenched his free fist, teeth gritting roughly. It was all a ploy, wasn’t it? It enraged Eren to see him this way, and now… The doctor had gone and made it worse.

Luckily, Levi seemed calm now, and stable. The soft drum of his monitor in the background was a gentle reminder. Levi was alive, he was okay. It was just a panic attack… Eren could deal with that. As long as Levi was safe, he told himself. The brunette sighed again, burrowing his face into the bed, right next to Levi’s side. The guilt was slowly eating him alive… A hand on his back snapped him out of his thoughts, making Eren look back at Kay. She was the only one in the room besides them, after all. 

Kay wore a sad smile as she gently rubbed Eren’s back. “It’s okay. We can help him, together. He’ll be out in no time. I promise. You can stay with us, if you want. I know you’re worried.” Kay offered. She knew Eren would stay with them at the hospital, but seeing Eren’s hysterical look as he was carrying Levi, she had sensed something. Something that her own lover looked at her with. Pure love, and concern. Levi and Eren needed each other, even if they both didn’t want to admit that. Kay had already spoken to Carla, unknowing that Mikasa also did. Mikasa was a king girl, just as her brother. Cold and distant, yes, but kind. She cared for Eren. Because Eren cared for Levi, Mikasa also did. Kay shook her own thoughts away, leaning back into her chair with a deep sigh.

Eren stared at Kay, green eyes wide. He could… Stay..? He was almost excited, if it wasn’t for the situation. To stay with Levi… Just as they did in their childhood… Feeling tears prick at his eyes, Eren made a rough sniffing sound, before burrowing his face back into the covers, the silent tears slipping from his eyes. Eren was emotional. Towards the feeling or rage, normally. But now… He felt relief. Relief that made him sob like a baby into the sheets. His friend was back… Annie was gone… Life was good.

 

 

* * *

 

Three months had passed. That was how long it took for Levi, Eren, and Kay to cope with their issues. It was never _just_ Levi’s problems. All of them were involved, in their own way. Kay, being the older sister. Eren, being the best friend he could be. It was a good mix. There were good days, and horrible days that none of them would mention. Those were the days where Levi would hiss at both of them, and demand to be left alone. Only to hear the monitor be disconnected, would Kay burst in to see Levi sitting outside. Of course. Then there were those good days, the ones where treatment went amazing, with a better doctor, and Levi was a ball, surprisingly, of smiles at Eren and his sister. Though the smiles died quickly, they were still there, hidden inside. Levi could be smiling in the inside, Eren thought.

Levi’s stomach had improved, and he no longer had fits of pain, that left him digging his nails deep into his skin until Eren would notice. He could eat properly, and not feel the urge to rush to the bathroom. It was a breath of relief for them all, seeing Levi grow better, and not in outrageous pain. He grew less irritable, being his teasing, calm self. Eren had a fit of laughter each time Levi would ‘Tch’ him or call him brat. Levi was back, _his_ Levi was back.

 

“Oi! Brat! Help me with these!” Levi called out, a scowl on his face. They were home, finally. He couldn’t be super active, according to his doctor, but he was allowed three laps around the block at a nice pace. Grudgingly, Levi had accepted.

 

Eren made a soft sound of surprise, scrambling up to the front door, where Levi was balancing most of their clothes from staying at the hospital. Quickly, the brunette opened the door, before taking the top two boxes. He let Levi enter first, smiling to himself at Levi’s small grumbles. Eren set the boxes on top of the others that Levi had stacked, before turning to his friend. He was about to speak, before Levi grabbed his wrist. Eren couldn’t help but be surprised

“We’re going somewhere. Shut up and come with me.” Levi said, obviously not taking no for an answer. With that ‘explanation,’ Levi tugged his friend out the front door, half waving at Kay. She had smiled, of course, and nodded. With Eren, Levi would be safe. Levi and her both knew she would trust him going anywhere with Eren or Mikasa.

Eren stumbled after the dark haired male, eyes falling onto Levi’s legs. He was his normal self again. Without the weird gown he could snicker ta, Levi was now wearing black skinny jeans, and a simple, plain, white tee shirt. It looked like Levi again. Shining eyes and all. This was the Levi he remembered from oh-so-long ago. Though it had been hell getting this Levi back, he was happy they were out of that hell now. “Oi?! Tell me where we’re going!” Eren complained, walking next to the man who still clutched onto his wrist. It wasn’t anything like hand holding, but regardless, Eren was still happy from the small action of contact from Levi. He hated this—this love sickening feeling. Levi was straight, and was only a friend. It was a simple reality.

The raven had snorted, turning around the block, converse making soft sounds against the concrete. “Idiot. It’s a surprise.” Levi retorted, tugging Eren up on the sidewalk next to him. He refused to let the brat go. It was a simple cover up, right? Tugging him. It wasn’t like Levi enjoyed this touch, right? That was the pondering that Levi did the whole way there. Three miles of walking, Eren complaining, and Levi silent in his thoughts. Occasionally, Levi would ‘Tch’ at Eren, or snort in amusement. That was all. Besides that, his mind constantly swirled with his own thoughts and worries. Was he really falling for this brat? Was this a delusion from the medicine? That only brought more confusion.

Luckily, they soon reached a long, stretching forest. Levi stopped, turning to face Eren with a grin. “It’s inside here. Catch me if you can! It’s your own fault if you get lost!” Levi shouted, quite loud at that. From there, Levi had turned his back on the brunette, ignoring his doctor’s wishes. Running? It didn’t hurt. So, why should he stop? Eren had screeched, and Levi laughed aloud, before his feet hit the plush grass of the woods, and the clean air filled his lungs. Plush, winding trees were raced by, and mud puddles were simply jumped over. It was so fun, almost like a snippet of the two’s childhood standing right in front of him. Eren was the same as before. Complaining about how fast Levi was, though he still scrambled to catch up behind him.

Stuck in his own laughter and excitement, as Levi raced between the mazes of trees, he didn’t hear the repeating of his cell phone ringing. Oblivious to the world, besides the thumping of his feet, and Eren’s laughter, Levi fell into a relaxed state. The air felt nice, filling his lungs… Before long, Levi had reached another burst of speed, just as he saw the red paint on the trees. Levi had found this place long ago, and decided to mark it. It was beautiful, a place of relaxation. Eren needed it. Levi needed it. So, why not share the beauty with his friend?

From there, Levi tumbled into the clearing, ashen eyes immediately filled with wonder. Each time, it never ceased to amaze him. A river ran softly, the bright blue contrasting perfectly with the lush green grass. A canopy of leaves made the place a nice, shaded area, with only small holes of sunlight shining in. Each time, it reminded Levi of something you would see inside a fairy tale, where faeries themselves would fly from the blossoming flowers, and fish would be plentiful in the beautiful springs Though it looked that way, this was still sad reality. Where outside of this circle, blood shed still was avid, and the world was a place of hate. It was this way everywhere. Only, places like this, distracted people from the sad reality that they lived in. Perhaps that’s why Levi enjoyed it so much.

Eren was also still, standing beside Levi. Levi was just as stunned as him. Eren’s teal eyes drifted over the whole scene in front of him, taking it all in. This time, it wasn’t just the trees and water he looked at... He stared at Levi, Levi’s shining eyes, and the way his pale skin looked. Levi was beautiful. Eren didn’t know why he hadn’t noticed it before… He was blind, entranced by Annie’s rebelliousness. He didn’t even realize… The most beautiful, the best person… Was right in front of him, the whole damn time. How stupid was he? Eren stood true to his childhood oblivious self, and it was a sad thing. To see this realization… To see how madly in love he was… It was slowly crushing him, into small, chewable bits that lingered and drifted across the sky. That was the only way he could describe it, even if it did sound like he was on crack.

“Brat? What’re you staring at?” Levi asked the boy, meeting his gaze. Levi flushed, but convinced himself that he was simply too cold. It was December, after all. No snow was falling, yet. The river was ice in some places, sure, but that didn’t make it un-swimmable. It just made it cold, and somewhat dangerous to his health. But, who cared about that right now? It was too good to be true, even though it was literally freezing outside.

Eren made a strangled sound, before his eyes widened, and the boy frowned. He decided to lie, his frown attempting to cover his obviously red cheeks. “Aren’t you cold, Levi? You shouldn’t be out here…” Eren huffed, holding out his coat. How idiotic was he to let Levi leave the house without a coat? God, he was so stupid. He couldn’t believe himself, honestly.

Levi rolled his eyes at the boy. “I want to go swimming, thought.” He said simply, twisting his arms around in his shirt. Obviously he was struggling to get it off.

Eren squeaked, launching forward. “Levi! Idiot! Keep your shirt on!” The brunette yelled, arms reaching out to force him to stay in his shirt. Sadly, it didn’t go as planned. Instead, his feet slipped out from underneath him, making Eren plummet into Levi. With a grunt from the dark haired male, and a squeak from Eren, the two went sailing into the cold grass.

Levi stared with wide eyes up at Eren, lips half parted. “Brat… What’re you doing?” Levi asked, voice quiet. This wasn’t the best position for him. What were these butterflies? It had to be the medicine, right?

Eren’s breath escaped him for a moment, as he stared down at Levi. His cheeks only grew redder by the seconds, as he was practically straddling Levi’s waist. “S-Sorry,” Eren murmured sheepishly, staring back into Levi’s wide eyes with his own. Staring into Levi’s eyes… His cheeks were flushed too… Suddenly, Levi raised a hand to point upwards.

“Snowflakes.” Levi whispered, eyes stuck on the white fluttering down from the cracks in between the trees.

“Snowflakes.” Eren repeated, though he didn’t look up. There was something even more beautiful below him, not above him. He couldn’t tug his eyes away, even when Levi had looked back at him. Levi said something, but Eren was more so focused on the movements of Levi’s lips. He wasn’t in control of his body anymore. Everything moved in slow motion… His senses were heightened, that was obvious. Levi’s and his own heartbeat rang loudly against his ears, as Eren outstretched a shaky hand to softly press his thumb against Levi’s chin. Was he really doing this..?

Levi’s breath hitched as well, when he felt the softness of Eren’s thumb brush against his cold skin. “Ere—“ Levi was cut off. But… By what? What was that warmth? What was this heart stopping feeling? Eren… kissed… him. Levi was deadly still for a moment, before realization hit him. Eren. Was. Kissing. Him. Slowly, Levi parted his lips, letting their lips move in sync. His dark lashed fluttered down against his pale skin, letting himself simply enjoy Eren. Eren, it was all Eren. The butterflies weren’t his medicine… It was Eren. Even the butterflies he felt now, and the fact his heart raced so damn fast—it was all Eren.

Eren let himself shiver, but in excitement. Levi was kissing him back… Something stirred in his stomach as the adrenaline rushed through him. This feeling… His breath was being stolen by Levi, then replaced by Levi’s own breath. It was almost as if they were breathing simply from each other, everything entwined. Levi’s arms were around him, Eren was cupping Levi’s chin, and the way their lips perfectly interlocked… It was heaven in a nutshell.

Levi pulled away slightly, but not to stop the kiss. Instead, he let himself pant for air, as he gazed up at Eren. He wouldn’t blame his medicine anymore. In fact, he recognized it now. These were his own impulses… Never the medicine. Always him, his own heart. Now that Eren was right here, kissing him—he could let this hidden shit out. With a small laugh, Levi rolled over, this time, pushing Eren down into the grass that was hinted with white. “You’re a dork.” Levi mused to Eren, before he attached their lips once more, this time, letting his hands cup Eren’s chin momentarily, before he took Eren’s warm hands in his own. He pressed their hands back against the grass, before taking the opportunity of Eren’s adorable sound to laugh, hazily against their lips. The kiss was intoxicating, and left Levi’s mind in a fuzzy ball of emotion. Was this all a dream? No, he could feel Eren’s warmth… It was lingering on his skin, leaving him to shiver. Not only from the cold, but the very emotion that he was letting himself be vulnerable to right now.

Eren laughed too, before the frenzy started again. They were both grinning, he could feel Levi’s lips stretch out, as well as his own. Happiness swelled inside of Eren. He couldn’t help it, he couldn’t help it at all. Eren gently squeezed Levi’s hands, before tilting his chin up farther to allow them to kiss keeper, shifting his body underneath of Levi. Levi made a strange groan sound, which made Eren simply giggle, and let themselves part.

Once again, the two panted, gasped for breath in the cold air, letting the oxygen sink into their lungs.

“You’re a dork too, Levi.” Eren said finally, once he finally got a lungful of air. After saying it, Eren gazed up at Levi, only to break out in a fit of laughter. Levi looked so flustered, with his eyebrows knit together, cheeks pink, and this strange sparkle of haziness in his eyes. The kiss truly had been intoxicating. Honestly, Eren was surprised he didn’t pass out from surprise, excitement, or the pure adrenaline that was rushing through his body. Luckily, he didn’t.

Levi opened his mouth to speak, but suddenly, he fell silent, glancing towards the woods. Eren heard it too. A crunch of twigs, and footsteps. Assuming it was just an animal was wrong. No, it was right. It was an animal. One that made Levi still, and fall into a deep silence. Not from surprise, but from paranoia.

 

“It took me forever to find you, boy? Did you miss me? How nice of you to bring me another play-toy. Even a gay one, how pretty.” The voice hissed, before the man revealed himself, greasy, black hair standing out against the light of the green leaves. The man’s ashen eyes were dull, filled with a haze of unmistakable lust. The sick lust, the one that still haunted Levi. Kenny Ackerman, the man responsible for this mess… Stood at the edge of the tree line, grinning something wicked at Eren and Levi.   

Levi was scared, to say the least. The memories were worse now, but the boy stood anyways, staring at Kenny with narrowed eyes, and fists clenched. He looked scared, and furious all at the same time. To see this rotten face again…

Eren had never seen this look of Levi. But, to see Kenny there… Rage filled him. But also, terror. Kenny was a strong man, Eren knew that. He was also a sick bastard, one who enjoyed playing with people. Standing slowly, Eren reached out for Levi. They should run… He was scared, and Levi was too. He could see it.

Instead of moving, Levi pushed Eren behind him. His eyes were dark, stormy, and full of rage. He wasn’t five anymore… Levi could fight. “You aren’t touching Eren.” Levi hissed, venom in his voice.

 

“Try me.” Kenny growled back, before lunging forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boom.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Intermission.   
> This chapter revolves around Kenny, and how he found his 'precious Play-Toy.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. Regardless of stress, and people, I WILL be posting. c: Love you all.~
> 
> So. This chapter. There's a lot of mention of gore, and rape. Not too graphic, as I was typing this mostly at school. I mean--   
> You have been warned.~ 
> 
> Disclaimer: Still don't own AoT. Never will. I own Kay, though. :D

> Intermission.

 

Kenny Ackerman was a wicked man. Vile. He thought of children as prey, a play toy, and simply something to be tossed around at his whim. That was the first stage of his madness. Sickening. Baths? Who needed those? Kenny viewed them to take too much time, as the cigarette smell covered it all anyways. That was the second stage of his madness. Cruel. Blood, how lovely the sight and feel… The screams of innocent people, their fear—It all compiled him father into his own sickening delusions. His mind was a dark place, constantly twisting and writhing around, desperately wanting to suck life out of others. Joy was a sickening thing; Kenny was the only one who should feel joy! In his mind, anyways. He didn’t think back to see when his mind became twisted and vile. In fact, Kenny saw nothing wrong with his state of mind. He saw truth, lust, and the undeniable pleasure needing to be served justice to its want. It was a fact of life, Kenny’s mind. It couldn’t be changed, not unless it was for the worse.

 

* * *

 

Many people wonder, in fact, Kenny still wonders to this day of how he actually did escape from prison. Of course, to his friends, Kenny would lie and say he killed the guard. That was far from the truth. Kenny’s cage had been unlocked by the drunken guard, and he slipped away without notice from the giant prison. It wasn’t that exhilarating, it wasn’t that courageous. It was Kenny Ackerman, after all.

* * *

 

“You see ‘dis Kenny? Your sons in the newspaper.” The girl mused, waving the crinkled paper around, only stirring up the smoke of tobacco and drugs even more. And, Levi was, even on the front page. The reporters spoke of his attempted suicide, and how his current condition in the hospital was. A picture, snagged by hell knows who, had captured a picture of the ambulance carrying Levi away, his face pale and sickly, with Eren’s blurred body to the side, his green eyes even bright in this black and white photo.

Kenny glanced up, cigarette dangling from his cracked, dry lips. “Oh? I haven’t heard from that bitch in a while.” Kenny snickered, reaching an arm out to the lady, letting her perch on his lap, her blue eyes trailing over the paper. “Not since his wretched sister stopped me.” The male growled, voice filled with venom.

The lady giggled, trailing her fingers over the words to focus better. “You broke him, Kenny! Be careful with your play toys. He’s in ‘da hospital now, tried to kill himself or something.” The girl said, chipper, as she let Kenny snatch the paper from her hands.

Levi was still living in the same area… and in the same hospital he was sent after Kenny played with him. The male licked his lips, eyes trailing over the photo to Eren. “Mm. I guess I’ll have to visit my Play Toy… He might have to be stretched out again, trained, and taught not to fuck with me again. His filthy sister, too.” Kenny said, shifting in his seat. He could visit his play toy again… To hear Levi’s cries, now that he was older… Kenny groaned, fingers curling around the newspaper. He was excited, his mind twisting with sick thoughts. Now, he had to go now. Levi would surely be out of the hospital now, just like the paper said, right? The man licked his dry lips, letting his cigarette fall onto the lady’s hand. The sick woman, she laughed at the pain.

 

* * *

 

He knew this street. He knew this street all too well. The dirty houses, the small shacks that showed poverty—this is where he first snatched Levi, after Kay tried to call the police. Of course, Levi was helpless, and Kay was frightened. Kay had ran away with her brother, but sadly to Kenny, the police were also right behind his tail. It was wretched, letting that bitch and his play toy escape. Gritting his teeth, the dark haired male stepped up on the sidewalk. 3621… 3622… He was getting closer. The sadist was filled with excitement. Hell, that brown haired friend of Levi’s was pretty nice too. Maybe he could play with him… Train him, make him the perfect kid, fit to Kenny’s will. It was an arousing thought, one that made Kenny’s mouth water, simply imagining the screams and cries of the two boys. Oh, how wonderful it would be. The blood… The fluids… Kenny stopped suddenly, staring up at the mailbox. This was it.

Kenny laughed, wildly, the laugh muffled from the wind of the snow picking up. Pathetic. Someone was home, at least.

Quickly, almost scrambling to get up to the door, the man ran a hand through his greasy hair, pushing most all of it from his eyes. Three lights were on. Were they that stupid when it came to saving money? Clicking his tongue, Kenny wrapped his calloused fingers around the door knob, grinning as it turned. Idiot play toy… Can’t even lock a door. Poor thing. Kenny pushed it open, letting it silently fall behind him, as his grimy shoes scuffed against the pale carpet.

“Anyone home?!” Kenny snarled, voice raspy, his hands trembling with sick excitement. His mind was filled, but with the things that should never be thought of. Levi, whining, screaming, panting, begging for him to stop, and the blood… Kenny shivered, but was quickly distracted by a clank. The man blinked, turning his head to glance towards the kitchen.

 

Kay was pale, deathly pale, as she clutched a kitchen knife in her hand. Her mind also ran, and her ashen eyes flashed brightly with fear, her eyes darker than ever. “What do you want? I’ll kill you! I’ll call the police!” Kay yelled, her hands shaking. Her tongue was loose, not able to form a proper threat except those two things, which sadly, were almost meaningless. The police would take forever, and she couldn’t over power this man… Kenny was strong, and knew her weak areas… Though, she didn’t cry, she didn’t shake. Because in one way, she was glad. Levi—Levi was gone, safe. She had to tell him not to come home. That thought racing through her mind, Kay took off running, just as Kenny took another step forward. She could hear him, laughing and running after her, items crashing. Dammit! Quickly, Kay dived into the bathroom, her frantic pale hands trying to slam the door shut.

Kenny’s hand slipped through the door, and the man grinned something terrifying. “Come back here, you bitch! Tell me where my play toy is!” He growled, pushing his body weight against the trembling door.

Kay hissed from the struggle, as she twisted one hand around, the one holding the knife. Just for a moment, dammit! She just needed five minutes, just five! Cursing aloud, Kay stabbed the knife harshly into Kenny’s hand. The sick man, he would enjoy that! “Go die!” Kay hissed at his hiss in pain, his hand slipping back. Everything moved in slow motion then, as her back heaved harder against the door, her shoulder blades digging into the wood. Kay, dammit, get stronger..! With one last shove, Kenny still distracted by the knife in his hand, Kay slammed the door, her shaking fingers locking it shut. Her breath ran ragged as she stumbled away from the shaking door, which Kenny was obviously punching. To think he would come today… He was supposed to be in prison, dammit!

Hissing in fear, Kay tugged out her cellphone, scrambling to hold it tightly. “Please, please, answer...” Kay whispered, before pressing the dial button. The pounding on the door stopped, suddenly, and Kay’s heart skipped a beat. The man, what was he doing? She was going to die… Tears welling in her eyes, Kay grimaced as she heard it. The voicemail… Levi wasn’t answering. Sobbing in defeat, Kay clutched the phone.

“Levi, call the police! Kenny, he’s over, he’s back, please, don’t come home!” Kay shouted, before the door went flying forward, the hinges cracked. Kay screamed in shock, the phone scrambling out of her hands.

 

Kenny grinned, something wicked, as he bent over calmly, picking up the phone. His eyes glimmered, the dark orbs trailing over Levi’s contact. Her GPS on him was active… Kenny grinned wider at the flickering icon, which then cut off at Cedar Road. He was in the woods, the damned brat. Didn’t Levi know that wolves hid in those trees, waiting to prey on people like him?

Kay grimaced as she watched Kenny bend over her, staring at the phone. That’s when it hit her. The GPS… Was on... Kay clenched her fists, lunging forward in an attempt to tackle the filthy man.

Kenny had grunted at the sudden attack, flicking his bleeding hand her way, which was holding the knife. “Filthy whore! Don’t touch me!” Kenny hissed darkly, before his hand flinched out again, allowing the blade to sink in her shoulder. When the girl cried out, the man grinned. The grin was dark, twisted, and yet so… horrifying. The blood gushed from the girl's shoulders, dripping and staining her chest and shirt. Normally, Kenny would have enjoyed that, played with this girl as well... But, Levi had to be played with first. 

His eyes glazed over the blonde, and her cries of pain rang against his ears. Greedy for more of those sounds, the filthy man lifted his foot back, before kicking his ‘daughter’ harshly in the stomach. Kay had gagged, obviously, spitting out a wad of blood. She looked so weak… The male chuckled, obviously pleased with himself. She could suffer, die slowly… He wanted to play with his better Play Toy… Before he left, however, the dark haired male bent down, trailing a blood stained finger over her lips. "Don't worry, I would play with you if I had time..." Kenny purred, the cigarette smell washing and curling through the air. Chuckling lowly, Kenny leaned down, flicking his slimy tongue against her breast, also lapping at the blood. Delicious... Not as much as Levi, though. Even her whimpers were pathetic compared to his play-toy. Kenny stood back up straight, observing the scene of the girl, curled in a ball, tears streaking her cheeks. She looked traumatized... It was amusing.   

 

* * *

 

Taking a deep breath of the metallic smelling air, Kenny wordlessly stepped from the bathroom. Levi… He couldn’t wait to see his toy’s face, the blood stained look… the substances dripping from him… Kenny licked his lips, before stepping towards the door.

* * *

 


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chase was on, the heated battle of life and death. Levi, Eren, Kenny... They were all battling for different things, but all wished to live through the deadly events that followed. 
> 
> *Slight gore warning, major explicit language.*

The race was on, this much Levi knew. His heart raced, fluttered, and threatened to explode of speed as Levi darted sideways. His pale fingers wrapped around Eren’s wrist, quickly, pulling him away from Kenny’s lunge. He never imagined the day he would see this filth again… It made his eyes hurt. His mind was full of thoughts, yes, but one stuck out like a needle in his mind. _Run. Get Eren safe. Run. Run!_

And so, that’s what Levi decided to do. He had to get Eren away, away from this wretched man. He had to get them somewhere safe! They had to lose Kenny! Luckily, Kenny had stumbled when they dodged the lunge. They would have a few seconds ahead. Levi quickly turned to Eren, his eyes wild. “We have to run! Your house!” Levi barked. They would be safest there. Carla was certain to have a gun, or a telephone to call the police.

Eren was immediately scrambling next to Levi. Run, of course. The brunette was frightened, to say the least, but he could still run. He sprinted after Levi, his teal eyes wide. Hopefully Kenny would lay there long enough… This was the man, the one Levi had been…abused…by. It made his adrenaline rush even more. They had to get the police, get this man killed for his actions.

The two were frantic at this point, sprinting wildly. Eren could hear Levi’s ragged breath, obviously from being in the hospital so long, and the pounding of his own heart. He heard occasional growls, sounds that made Eren want to scream. Kenny was just behind them, no doubt about it. It was a petrifying thought, knowing Kenny was just a few tree lengths away.

The two weaved, frantically, through the white dusted trees. It was like a corrupted maze, only, they were racing death; the bitter thing. The cold stung their lungs, breath ragged, eyes wide, fists clenched. There would be blood on their palms, no doubt about that. The crimson dots would hit the pure fluffy snow, staining the pureness of it. The forest seemed forever, the maze of trees never ending. Levi was still in front, panting and clinging onto Eren’s wrist. He refused to let the other go—to let him slip closer and closer to Kenny. Though, he only prayed the man didn’t have a gun. Levi’s heart raced at the very thought, his breath still ragged and rough. His skin was cold, despite the utter fear and rush of sprinting running through their veins. It was odd, but obviously, Levi didn’t have time to ponder it.

His ashen eyes were set ahead, darting around desperately, trying to find an exit from this horror. They had to get out, they had to get home… Levi had to make sure Eren was safe. He loved him, Levi knew that now. He wanted to cry it out, to tell Eren at least once how much he loved him. It felt stupid, realizing it at a time like this. When pain and terror flowed, but that was Levi’s luck, apparently. Even if Eren already knew, from their kiss, he had to say it. He had to make it official. He had to live, Eren had to live! Levi wouldn’t lose now. The dark haired male inhaled sharply, the bitter air once again filling his lungs. It stung, terribly, but he had to deal with it. For Eren, for life.

Then, there was a light. He could see the street! Levi made a soft sound, as he suddenly whipped around the next tree, attempting not to stumble from the force. Luckily, Eren was swift as well, following right behind him. Kenny seemed closer, but they were free now! They just had to hide, or get home! But, could they outrun the killer behind them? He could hear it; Kenny’s ragged breaths and ragged laughter, the one that pierced his ears and made him shudder. Levi’s fingers tightened gently around Eren’s wrist. He didn’t want to leave bruises on Eren, ever, but at this moment, his mind wasn’t exactly functioning.

Levi’s mind was a mess, and he assumed the younger male’s was as well. He felt awful for that fact, to drag Eren into this damned mess… Levi winced, shaking his thoughts away. He took another deep breath of the chilly air, turning quickly, as his feet hit the pavement. They were free of the mess of trees, finally!

Eren was relieved, seeing as they were out of the mess of thick trees. Kenny was gaining, though… Still, Eren was surprised. His teal eyes were wild and wild as they raced down the road, because that one thought kept hitting him. What if—What if Kenny _did_ have a gun? Was he waiting for something special? Eren’s insides chilled a bit at the thought. He didn’t want any more blood to be spilled… Not now, not today, not ever. Levi had just gotten out of the hospital… Eren would take a bullet for his friend. Mentally, he knew this. Psychically… He only hoped his body would react in time. The boy grit his teeth, letting his eyes dart ahead to stare at the back of Levi’s head. Eren was slowly losing speed, as was Levi. This wasn’t good… Nervously, Eren let out a broken sound, eyes darting frantically around the streets now. He didn’t recognize this part of town…

Levi had hissed out a sound as well. Of course, the man was frantic, as his jelly like legs took more steps forward, quickly. It was the adrenaline, no doubt. His lungs felt like they were dying, his feet burned, his legs burned—but yet, he kept pushing through. This was the feeling others had talked about… Your body realizing that there was a high possibility you would die. Death, what a lovely chill to have at this time.  

“I’m not ready, dammit!” Levi cried out, loudly, before he gritted his teeth, forcing his legs to move faster, fight the pain, and _keep going._ He had to; for Eren! Even though darkness seemed to be cascading everywhere, the evil of life, the horrors of reality, Levi wanted to fight on. For Eren, for Kay, for all the memories he still wanted to make, and hell, even for Christmas. He wanted to see the brat under the mistletoe, he wanted to see the brat laugh, to see his goofy smile again, and those shining eyes; that was worth fighting for.

His thoughts were interrupted though, by a sharp laugh, and a tumble. Shit, was Eren falling? Levi’s breath was blown away in that moment, as slowly, deadly, the dark haired male sailed forward, his ashen eyes widening by the second. It seemed to move in slow motion, the body tumbling forward on him, the utter pain of his cheek scraping against pavement, and the disgruntled cry of Eren. Then, the wicked laughter again; the wheezy sound of a smokers laugh, filled with dark twines of sadistic thoughts. They had gotten so far… But it didn’t matter now.

Eren gasped, sputtered, and wheezed for breath against Levi. He messed up… He tripped… This was all his fault. Slowly, the brunette opened his tear filled eyes, swallowing thickly. The two were in a heap in the snow pavement that was now… stained with blood. Levi’s cheek was scraped… They couldn’t worry about that now, though. He had to run again, he had to get them safe. Kenny didn’t seem thrilled by that idea, though.

The filthy man wore a sneer, both at the sight of the trembling heap of his play toys, and the utter relief. “I win, Levi! I was going to offer that you be my play toy again, and I’ll leave him alone,” Kenny mused, pale hand slipping into his pocket. “but, I guess I can play with you both! Such naughty boys, really.” Kenny breathed, snickering lowly. That’s when it was pulled out, the object Eren most feared.

The gun.

Levi froze, his ashen eyes glinting with a wild look. “I won’t let you have him.” The male snapped, with an inhumane sound.

Eren seemed petrified now too, frozen against Levi’s cold chest, unable to move his trembling legs. They were going to die. Right here, right like this. It was hopeless, wasn’t it? Trembling, Eren tried to shift, tried to sit up—anything. He couldn’t move… Not an inch…

“No,” Eren whispered, the tears silently dripping down his pale cheeks at this point. “Levi, I can’t move.” Eren whispered, voice pathetic, low, and filled with hopelessness. He wanted to fight, dammit! He didn’t want to die. Not here, not now! But, the terror, and the utter panic had taken over his body.

Levi swallowed thickly, his own hands shifting underneath him. His face was tilted crookedly now, as he peered up at the filth and Eren. Kenny seemed to be taking his time, waiting for the right moment. Was he too much of a coward to shoot them? He wanted to play with them first? The dark haired male gritted his teeth, tightly, pushing his hands firm against the concrete. He had to get up, dammit! “Shit,” Levi croaked out, before with one heave, the ravenette procced himself up, slightly, just enough for Eren to roll to the side with a slight gasp. “There’s still hope, you fuck. Stop smirking at me,” Levi growled, sharply, pushing on his trembling hands again. No, he wouldn’t let Kenny win. Not this easily.

Kenny quirked an eyebrow, but lightly. He still wore the smirk, though it lessened. “Such a bad boy! You can’t fight back. Don’t worry, I’ll shoot you both, and then fuck your bodies. The blood is better that way anyways, play toy.” Kenny practically moaned.

It made a shudder run through Levi, to say the least. “You’re fucking disgusting! Die!” Levi yelled sharply, earning a shiver from the brunette beside him. With a cry of utter determination, Levi shoved himself of harshly from the ground, pushing himself into a stumbling stand. He didn’t have a second to waste—the gun was aimed, at Eren.

It was the adrenaline again, the utter feeling of weightlessness as he shoved his whole body forward into a sloppy lunge. It had to work; he didn’t have time to miss. Levi’s eyes, they were something else during this time. Sharp, determined, and fierce. He didn’t want to give up this time, there was a point behind it all. Life. He had to live. To live, he needed Eren! Crying out wildly, Levi let his hands fly out, as he pushed himself against Kenny, fingers slowly, but surely, wrapping around the gun.

Kenny growled, something fierce. It was practically tug a war now. Their fingers fought over the trigger, the barrel of the gun—all of it. The winner would live, the loser would die. It was that simple.

Father and son, ironically. It was a fight over life between those of the same blood, the same line of filth. Levi wasn’t Kenny, though. He knew that now. That’s why, that was another reason, why Levi had to live. Levi’s eyes met his father’s sharp ones. They wore the same glint, the same look of intensity. Their bodied wobbled as one, each of the Ackerman’s pushing to gain control.

Then, it came. The dominate hand pushed, tugged, and viciously, one of the Ackerman’s had the gun. The deadly item was pointed.

 

The shot was sure to be heard all around town. The blood was sure to stain the streets, and memories of others. Blood, guts, and ripped flesh. It was an awful sight, and the stench of the blood was even worse. This blood—this day—they would all change the way this small town worked. The impact of the fire, it would change many things in this small town. In that moment, only Eren saw the outcome. No one else was there to witness the horror of a bullet flying through a human’s head, their brains and blood splattering the live human, and the snowy streets. The droplets of blood even dared to fly as far to hit the brunette’s face, to stain his horror ridden look with the crimson liquid. Never before had Eren seen a man shot, never before had he seen so much blood. And never before, had Eren screamed so loud.              ~~~~

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO-I know you all probably hate me for the cliff hanger. Sorry.~ 
> 
> Updates have been slow, I know. I was losing inspiration until today. Things have been a mush, recently. Deadlines, exams, anxiety, other writings, and simple ole' life have gotten in the way. I'm sorry! 
> 
> Once again, Happy birthday Levi. I really hope I get this all done by your birthday. I miss you, tree.


End file.
